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A guy asked me to kill 15 trolls, how do I prove that I did it?
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In my world there are adventurers who are squeamish about getting blood on them. Trolls are commonly hunted by adventurers. What trophy can my squeamish adventurers collect from these trolls, and not get blood on them, to prove their kills and collect their rewards from towns?
I just realized that trolls in mythology have no clear anatomy and probably the term was just used to describe people living isolated in mountains or forests
Later, in Scandinavian folklore, trolls became beings in their own right, where they live far from human habitation, are not Christianized, and are considered dangerous to human beings. Depending on the source, their appearance varies greatly; trolls may be ugly and slow-witted, or look and behave exactly like human beings, with no particularly grotesque characteristic about them.
So I'm going with the look World of Warcraft gave to trolls, they don't turn to stone in sunlight.
medieval alternate-worlds fantasy-races
edited 2 days ago
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asked Nov 13 at 18:31
Eries
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In my world there are adventurers who are squeamish about getting blood on them. Trolls are commonly hunted by adventurers. What trophy can my squeamish adventurers collect from these trolls, and not get blood on them, to prove their kills and collect their rewards from towns?
I just realized that trolls in mythology have no clear anatomy and probably the term was just used to describe people living isolated in mountains or forests
Later, in Scandinavian folklore, trolls became beings in their own right, where they live far from human habitation, are not Christianized, and are considered dangerous to human beings. Depending on the source, their appearance varies greatly; trolls may be ugly and slow-witted, or look and behave exactly like human beings, with no particularly grotesque characteristic about them.
So I'm going with the look World of Warcraft gave to trolls, they don't turn to stone in sunlight.
medieval alternate-worlds fantasy-races
edited 2 days ago
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asked Nov 13 at 18:31
Eries
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Take a selfie with each dead troll :)
– Surb
Nov 14 at 12:41
18
Squeamish adventurers that kill. Sounds like this is a self-solving problem because such adventurers probably wouldn't get hired or are too squeamish for the task at hand. I think that after a troll swings their weapon at the adventurer's neckline for the nth consecutive time then the adventurer should get over their squeamishness or is already ded.
– MonkeyZeus
Nov 14 at 13:45
6
Beowulf brought home Grendel's arm for proof. Which, uh, worked soooooo well.
– Damon
Nov 14 at 14:36
3
Why are we killing things? Why 15 things? Usually when people in this world get annoyed at each other, they don't have a specific victim count they're going for. In fact, the way that I think the professionals usually do it is, "kill all x in place y", or even, "take x from those guys". So, this question's objective would be made a bit moot by having a more substantial objective.
– sethrin
Nov 15 at 3:29
2
Most people seem to have missed the obvious. If the trolls are already dead they won't bleed anymore...
– Drunken Code Monkey
Nov 15 at 13:59
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up vote
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up vote
27
down vote
favorite
In my world there are adventurers who are squeamish about getting blood on them. Trolls are commonly hunted by adventurers. What trophy can my squeamish adventurers collect from these trolls, and not get blood on them, to prove their kills and collect their rewards from towns?
I just realized that trolls in mythology have no clear anatomy and probably the term was just used to describe people living isolated in mountains or forests
Later, in Scandinavian folklore, trolls became beings in their own right, where they live far from human habitation, are not Christianized, and are considered dangerous to human beings. Depending on the source, their appearance varies greatly; trolls may be ugly and slow-witted, or look and behave exactly like human beings, with no particularly grotesque characteristic about them.
So I'm going with the look World of Warcraft gave to trolls, they don't turn to stone in sunlight.
medieval alternate-worlds fantasy-races
edited 2 days ago
Community♦
1
asked Nov 13 at 18:31
Eries
1,16241330
In my world there are adventurers who are squeamish about getting blood on them. Trolls are commonly hunted by adventurers. What trophy can my squeamish adventurers collect from these trolls, and not get blood on them, to prove their kills and collect their rewards from towns?
I just realized that trolls in mythology have no clear anatomy and probably the term was just used to describe people living isolated in mountains or forests
Later, in Scandinavian folklore, trolls became beings in their own right, where they live far from human habitation, are not Christianized, and are considered dangerous to human beings. Depending on the source, their appearance varies greatly; trolls may be ugly and slow-witted, or look and behave exactly like human beings, with no particularly grotesque characteristic about them.
So I'm going with the look World of Warcraft gave to trolls, they don't turn to stone in sunlight.
medieval alternate-worlds fantasy-races
medieval alternate-worlds fantasy-races
edited 2 days ago
Community♦
1
asked Nov 13 at 18:31
Eries
1,16241330
edited 2 days ago
Community♦
1
asked Nov 13 at 18:31
Eries
1,16241330
edited 2 days ago
Community♦
1
edited 2 days ago
Community♦
1
edited 2 days ago
Community♦
1
1
asked Nov 13 at 18:31
Eries
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asked Nov 13 at 18:31
Eries
1,16241330
asked Nov 13 at 18:31
Eries
1,16241330
1,16241330
21
Take a selfie with each dead troll :)
– Surb
Nov 14 at 12:41
18
Squeamish adventurers that kill. Sounds like this is a self-solving problem because such adventurers probably wouldn't get hired or are too squeamish for the task at hand. I think that after a troll swings their weapon at the adventurer's neckline for the nth consecutive time then the adventurer should get over their squeamishness or is already ded.
– MonkeyZeus
Nov 14 at 13:45
6
Beowulf brought home Grendel's arm for proof. Which, uh, worked soooooo well.
– Damon
Nov 14 at 14:36
3
Why are we killing things? Why 15 things? Usually when people in this world get annoyed at each other, they don't have a specific victim count they're going for. In fact, the way that I think the professionals usually do it is, "kill all x in place y", or even, "take x from those guys". So, this question's objective would be made a bit moot by having a more substantial objective.
– sethrin
Nov 15 at 3:29
2
Most people seem to have missed the obvious. If the trolls are already dead they won't bleed anymore...
– Drunken Code Monkey
Nov 15 at 13:59
|
show 13 more comments
21
Take a selfie with each dead troll :)
– Surb
Nov 14 at 12:41
18
Squeamish adventurers that kill. Sounds like this is a self-solving problem because such adventurers probably wouldn't get hired or are too squeamish for the task at hand. I think that after a troll swings their weapon at the adventurer's neckline for the nth consecutive time then the adventurer should get over their squeamishness or is already ded.
– MonkeyZeus
Nov 14 at 13:45
6
Beowulf brought home Grendel's arm for proof. Which, uh, worked soooooo well.
– Damon
Nov 14 at 14:36
3
Why are we killing things? Why 15 things? Usually when people in this world get annoyed at each other, they don't have a specific victim count they're going for. In fact, the way that I think the professionals usually do it is, "kill all x in place y", or even, "take x from those guys". So, this question's objective would be made a bit moot by having a more substantial objective.
– sethrin
Nov 15 at 3:29
2
Most people seem to have missed the obvious. If the trolls are already dead they won't bleed anymore...
– Drunken Code Monkey
Nov 15 at 13:59
21
21
Take a selfie with each dead troll :)
– Surb
Nov 14 at 12:41
Take a selfie with each dead troll :)
– Surb
Nov 14 at 12:41
18
18
Squeamish adventurers that kill. Sounds like this is a self-solving problem because such adventurers probably wouldn't get hired or are too squeamish for the task at hand. I think that after a troll swings their weapon at the adventurer's neckline for the nth consecutive time then the adventurer should get over their squeamishness or is already ded.
– MonkeyZeus
Nov 14 at 13:45
Squeamish adventurers that kill. Sounds like this is a self-solving problem because such adventurers probably wouldn't get hired or are too squeamish for the task at hand. I think that after a troll swings their weapon at the adventurer's neckline for the nth consecutive time then the adventurer should get over their squeamishness or is already ded.
– MonkeyZeus
Nov 14 at 13:45
6
6
Beowulf brought home Grendel's arm for proof. Which, uh, worked soooooo well.
– Damon
Nov 14 at 14:36
Beowulf brought home Grendel's arm for proof. Which, uh, worked soooooo well.
– Damon
Nov 14 at 14:36
3
3
Why are we killing things? Why 15 things? Usually when people in this world get annoyed at each other, they don't have a specific victim count they're going for. In fact, the way that I think the professionals usually do it is, "kill all x in place y", or even, "take x from those guys". So, this question's objective would be made a bit moot by having a more substantial objective.
– sethrin
Nov 15 at 3:29
Why are we killing things? Why 15 things? Usually when people in this world get annoyed at each other, they don't have a specific victim count they're going for. In fact, the way that I think the professionals usually do it is, "kill all x in place y", or even, "take x from those guys". So, this question's objective would be made a bit moot by having a more substantial objective.
– sethrin
Nov 15 at 3:29
2
2
Most people seem to have missed the obvious. If the trolls are already dead they won't bleed anymore...
– Drunken Code Monkey
Nov 15 at 13:59
Most people seem to have missed the obvious. If the trolls are already dead they won't bleed anymore...
– Drunken Code Monkey
Nov 15 at 13:59
|
show 13 more comments
27 Answers
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Hire or Enslave a worker to do the dirty work for you
Surely there are poor unskilled people who you can pay on the cheap to do the dirty work of carrying and harvesting your trophy body parts. Best part is now you can remain unencumbered should you be ambushed. This also increases your inventory as the worker can carry supplies too.
If the worker is too expensive or scared of the job
Slavery works too!
Capture a goblin or something and make him do the work. Chain his neck so he cant run. Be careful as he may try to kill you in your sleep. Though, if you are a decent adventurer you will sleep cautiously anyways (keeps ya on your toes).
answered Nov 13 at 19:16
anon
10.2k1357
1
This seems like the answer medieval society would come up with, this is the same society that paid people to eat your sins.
– John
Nov 15 at 23:38
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51
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Cut off their tusks
Fortunately, trolls have tusks. Cutting the end off of tusks takes a bit of work, but there is no blood involved, so it is suitable even for the squeamish.
Note, horns are keratin over bone. Tusks are overgrown teeth. Troll tusks won't bleed.
answered Nov 13 at 18:39
kingledion
70.1k24235407
14
As someone who has witnessed the cutting of cow horns, let me tell you, they bleed and freakishly so. There is no guarantee that a troll tusk would not bleed unless you took the very tip. But if you only took the tip who is to say it came from a troll and not something like a boar.
– anon
Nov 13 at 20:08
17
@anon Horns are keratin over bone. Tusks are overgrown teeth. Troll tusks won't bleed. Hopefully, they have a unique smell they can be identified by. Hopefully.
– kingledion
Nov 13 at 20:45
30
It they pay enough for "killing the trolls", I'm sure some entrepreneurs will start breeding trolls in captivity so they can sell their tusks. There are stories about similar things happening with snakes in India.
– vsz
Nov 14 at 5:31
6
@vsz or rat farms in Thailand.
– Harper
Nov 14 at 7:35
8
Tips of tusks grow back in most species. Tusks exist for most species as tools and are therefore constantly growing. Cutting in to the root (and hence blood) will cause the tooth to die, but is against the OP's request. Basically, this will incentivize down-and-out trolls to sell some tusk tips. Or as others have pointed out, to have others start troll farms.
– ColonelPanic
Nov 14 at 10:43
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Fine, Strip them and Bring their crotch straps back
-Trolls wear loin clothes at least
-Trolls aren't hygienic so it would be hard to forge multiple used troll crotch straps
-So if they really press whether they are real or not you can tell the NPC to smell them and find out.
answered Nov 13 at 18:34
anon
10.2k1357
18
Tough luck if you have to destroy the troll nudist camp down at the beach though.
– AmiralPatate
Nov 14 at 6:55
2
@Shadowzee "Baring a body part unique to a troll"? Ew.
– Rand al'Thor
Nov 14 at 7:43
9
Easily defrauded: Go to the troll camp and trade for their dirty laundry. Or kill one troll, then go to its home and collect all its other loincloths from wherever they're stored while not being worn. No matter how unhygienic trolls may be, they are unlikely to have only a single loincloth.
– Dave Sherohman
Nov 14 at 10:05
1
@DaveSherohman Troll mythology rarely depicts such advanced behavior like communities to trade with or a troll having a wardrobe in which they change clothes. So adding such possibilities would be creative choice to directly defeat this idea which is unreasonable. In most classical depictions of troll dwellings theres actually very little in the way of creature comforts especially changes in clothes, which reinforces the notion that they never do change their clothes making loin cloths unique to the troll.
– anon
Nov 14 at 13:48
1
@Shadowzee The girth and design/ornamentation could indicate species even regional variations. Different animals smell differently matter of fact dogs have keenly picked up on this and could be used to spot counterfeits.
– anon
Nov 14 at 15:21
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Get hold of a couple of palantirs palantiri. The NPC can watch the live action.
answered Nov 13 at 19:10
chasly from UK
6,38222963
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Necromancy
Why cut off a ear when you can kill two trolls with one spell? You could get your hands dirty cutting off ears, and the quest giver might still suspect you made fake ears. It'd take a brave person to accuse you of making 15 fake zombie trolls. Even if the contract requires you to remove the ears (and you are the lawful sort), you could keep your own hands clean and just get your zombie minions to remove each other's ears. If after all that they still refuse to pay... well then you have 16 pet zombies. It is win-win!
answered Nov 14 at 7:14
gmatht
2,7741611
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Assert you did.
Thrash up your stuff and bloody your sword. Go back to the dude. Yell "I KILLED TROLLLLLS!" Let the residual battle frenzy gleam in your eye. Make sure he understands you have suffered much brain damage from many fights over your life, but if anything that has increased your 99 strength.
If he starts laying conditions and caveats on you, become angry. If he says you did not follow the instructions, show him the blood on your weapons and yell about trolls.
He will offer you half pay to leave and not come back. He will apologetically explain he needed the troll parts which is why it is just half pay, but he feels bad about wasting your time. Take the money in exchange for him conceding that you killed the trolls. Give him a tip with his own money for saying it.
answered Nov 13 at 19:15
Willk
97.1k25188409
26
Knowing some games/stories, you are actually threatening the retired legendary dragon slayer who single handedly saved the entire continent from an apocalyptic doom and is now retired and guiding new adventurers from behind the scenes.
– Shadowzee
Nov 14 at 3:44
2
Go into merchant store, talk about getting paid for not doing your work. Showing you are an adventurer. Getting a strait in your head. Every merchant have loaded crossbow under the counter just for the people like you.
– SZCZERZO KŁY
Nov 14 at 14:47
1
Given the adventurers in question are squeamish about handling blood, I can only assume the substance coating their weapons is actually barbecue sauce. (The dumb ones use ketchup, but are easily caught out as it dries too bright a shade.)
– jmbpiano
Nov 15 at 23:47
1
This looks like something out of interpersonal or workplace stack exchange :)
– Mad Physicist
yesterday
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DOCUMENTATION
All your main char has to do is bring a vial of ink with him/her and also a sheet of paper (hopefully a journal). Assuming your character has the literacy skill > 10, they should be able to read and write.
After your character has slain the trolls, have the character take out some ink and a sheet of paper. Spread the ink over the troll hand and ear. Attach the sheet of paper to the hand and then the ear. The ink marks from hand/ears should be unique to each troll. Now present your slaying documentation to your quest giver and bing bang boom LEVEL UP!
answered Nov 13 at 20:54
Crettig
2,582722
4
I suspect it will be quite hard to tell the difference between imprints from two different trolls, and two imprints from the same troll in different positions.
– Brilliand
Nov 13 at 21:47
4
@Brilliand "All trolls look alike!1!" --- nah
– hiergiltdiestfu
Nov 14 at 8:15
3
This is what I was going to post. If they resemble humans so much, no finger/palm print would match between trolls. To be paid, your print must be verified at the Scotland Bard's National Bureau of Troll Identification. If you bring in a copy, you forfeit your troll hunting rights for life. If it's a legit hand print, you get your gold.
– ColonelPanic
Nov 14 at 10:41
1
Let's say you're to provide left hand/ear prints. Could you over-ink enough to take a right hand/ear print, then use a second sheet of paper to obtain a reverse copy of same? that would let you take out 8 trolls, but have evidence indicating you took out 16. Also - what if a troll is missing their left hand/ear?
– RDFozz
Nov 16 at 20:04
1
@RDFozz I trust the invisible medieval gauntlet of capitalism to find a solution to the counterfeiting problem (a guild of checkers to check for dupes as an example). I was under the impression ever since I was 11 and playing DND that Trolls always regenerate. If that isn't the case, I suppose people would just accept whatever details were available. Supposing they have NO ears or hands, the market probably would deem them as "not harmful" and therefor not worth the normal quest market price.
– Crettig
Nov 16 at 20:12
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Ear Wax
Troll Earwax is the best wax for clean burning candles. Your quest is not simply to go kill these trolls but to harvest their earwax. You are paid by the weight of wax brought back that way fair compensation goes for bigger trolls with more wax than the smaller trolls who just don't make enough yet.
answered Nov 13 at 22:01
Reed
2,132415
6
You don't know how badly this makes me want to post another answer for "Troll Semen" to support conservational efforts in lieu of the genocidal adventures.
– anon
Nov 14 at 2:57
2
@anon How are you going to collect semen from a dead troll?
– Nzall
Nov 15 at 13:31
1
@anon what sucks is the asymmetry of that "lacking the proper equipment and knowledge, I just grabbed these instead" holds up ovaries by the fallopian tubes leaving behind dead males with a goofy grin and females looking disembowelled.
– Alec Teal
yesterday
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Take along an agreed credible witness to document the activity.
Perhaps a priest or other literate person.
Does create the extra bother of protecting them.
answered Nov 14 at 4:57
Keith
83438
8
Protection is only a problem if you actually kill a troll, rather than agree to donate half the reward to the church.
– Dewi Morgan
Nov 14 at 21:53
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10
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Collect their foreskins.
David was tasked by Saul to collect a dowry of 100 Philistine deaths. David, one of life's over-achievers, returned with proof of their deaths in the form of 200 of the offending articles.
Therefore David arose and went, he and his men, and slew of the
Philistines two hundred men; and David brought their foreskins, and
they gave them in full number to the king, that he might be the king's
son-in-law. And Saul gave him Michal his daughter as his wife.
1 Samuel 18:27
Not only was it super-effective in proving their deaths (since no respecting Philistine would allow David's small army to mess with their junk if they could possibly help it) but it was both portable and relatively non-bloody because a dead body has practically no bloodflow.
If your men are genuinely squeamish about even a single drop of blood they can use the local equivalent of cautery by heating a razor-sharp knife over a flame until red hot. This will seal the blood vessels as they cut.
answered Nov 14 at 21:01
Richard
652417
Came here to give the same answer. Also, David couldn't just raze the first village on the way, as women have no foreskins. He also couldn't ask his own men for a donation to the wedding fund, because they already had their foreskins removed. So Philistines were the only available source. And by the way, doubling the required number was quite a feat, but I think it would have been even funnier, if he came back with those guys alive, well,, and converted to Judaism :)
– Darth Hunterix
Nov 16 at 7:55
2
@DarthHunterix - The was one of the plot points in Heller's parody "God Knows". David is initially under the impression that he has to circumcise the philistines live and budgets accordingly "Allowing about an hour, on average, to locate and seize each Philistine for circumcision, and working with four squads of six men taking their daylight nourishment on the prowl rather than breaking for lunch...". He's much happier to learn that he can simply kill them first.
– Richard
Nov 16 at 8:06
Good one :) However I meant an actual conversion, turning them from enemies into friends. In any case, all three options are badass enough on their own.
– Darth Hunterix
Nov 16 at 8:44
What if trolls (a) are born without foreskins (b) are circumcised to prevent the shame of having their foreskin stolen if they are killed. Maybe this was the origin of circumcision. Maybe warring tribes used to use this as evidence of kills.
– chasly from UK
Nov 16 at 11:36
@chaslyfromUK - you can really cut of any non-fleshy part like an ear as long as you wait for the blood to congeal a little
– Richard
Nov 16 at 15:11
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Burn the Body, then bring back the skull.
answered Nov 15 at 22:11
Stephan
1,362212
Short, sweet and to the point!
– elemtilas
Nov 15 at 22:47
This actually does work, a bit time consuming but it works.
– anon
2 days ago
You can burn a dead troll's body that you didnt even kill, bring the skull back, and say "hey I killed this with just my thumb!"
– Mr.J
23 hours ago
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The squeamish adventurers kill the troll via boredom.
No blood, no guts, nothing.
The adventure pays (on account of being squeamish) individuals without a sense of smell to carry/drag/transport the full troll body back in an ice bag.
- The guild must acknowledge that it is indeed a dead troll, no questions asked.
- The adventurer is renowned for their ability to slay otherwise quite difficult to kill trolls without actually laying a hand on them.
- The DM buys shares in the ice business because it's going to be big.
edited Nov 14 at 18:50
nzaman
8,73611443
answered Nov 14 at 3:28
Kain0_0
4623
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Make a travois! They're certainly simpler to make than anything with wheels
Regardless of your power level, dragging is easier than carrying. Travois don't require wheels, though it's certainly an option to reduce your expended effort. Make it longer, or tie a rope to it if you're still getting nauseous. Regardless, it's a simple enough device that you can hook it up to a horse or an unenthusiastic hireling
That being said, a cart or wagon will serve you better, but that's less outside-the-box
answered Nov 13 at 19:23
Punintended
4536
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You see hiring a guy to kill 15 troll and not telling them how he should prove those 15 kills would be the stupidest idea ever. Why?
Because person who take a quest to kill 15 troll IS the person who will drag (or will hire other people to drag) 15 rotting, smelly, troll carcasses to your doors to prove that they, in fact, killed them. And to prove that those are their kill, and not some roadkills they find lying around, they will either catch souls of those trolls to testify before you who slayed them or will have you watch their death with some magic.
Great deal, now you have 15 rotting meatbags, 15 screaming souls or you watched so many troll death you have it imprinted in your eyeballs and one person who you need to pay because you see they are nothing to flick around.
You know what is better? That don't have blood? That don't require you to watch? And will have higher crop with the same bounty? Troll Jewellery. Let's say that troll wears rings. They have finite amount of fingers so you assume that every troll can wear 10 of them. So you say "hey, bring me 150 troll rings".
The catch is that not every troll wear 10 rings. Some wear 3, some wear none. The result is that to get 150 rings adventurers need to kill much more. Yet the guild pay like they would kill 15 of them.
EXTRA CATCH FOR MAXIMUM EXTRA MEGA PROFIT The guild, and trolls, are the only ones who can melt those ring into "non-troll, not at all, all genuine dwarf" jewellery. So you make those rings worthless outside guild quest while fetching extra money. Basically the quest pay for itself while making extra income for the guild.
And this is the story of how make money in fantasy world using cheap labour and monopolizing market.
answered Nov 14 at 14:30
SZCZERZO KŁY
15.3k22346
in my original question this was an RPG quest situation where the protagonist didn't read the quest instructions. But it got edited to fit the worldbuilding format.
– Eries
Nov 14 at 14:34
2
@Eries for that reason quest instructions would have "I have read and agreed" at the bottom and if protagonist did something else then he would not get paid. Also very RPG guild move to kill troll and not pay adventurers who don't read.
– SZCZERZO KŁY
Nov 14 at 14:37
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If you're really going with World of Warcraft (or D&D) style trolls, you've got a problem: They regenerate:
Although enough physical damage will kill them, trolls can regenerate lost limbs and heal grievous physical injuries at an accelerated rate, giving them a large advantage in battle.
So your proof is going to have to be something that doesn't regenerate. If you choose ears, or tusks, or fingers, or hands, or feet, your adventurers don't need to kill 15 trolls, they can capture just one, then harvest it for the relevant body part over and over (in both D&D and WoW, troll regeneration from nearly dead to unharmed occurs in the space of a few minutes at most, so you could harvest 15 trolls worth of body parts in the space of an hour, give or take).
So you need something that won't regenerate and can be uniquely associated with a single troll.
Unfortunately, the obvious solution here (in terms of maximum proof for minimum "amount of troll") is scalps; sure, the scalp itself can regenerate, but the hair is dead, and presumably grows at a relatively normal rate; you could harvest scalps over and over, but scalp #2 and onwards wouldn't have hair. The reason I say "unfortunately" is that nothing bleeds like a scalp wound and your adventurers are squeamish. As others have suggested, once the troll is dead, you could just wait a bit and the blood should coagulate, but if they don't want to deal with blood at all, they're stuck. Claws might also work (though in most depictions of trolls, a chopped off arm grows back with claws, so they may not be made of dead material the way human fingernails are).
The best I can come up with is having them collect the hair itself. It's not perfect; trolls have wildly varying amounts of, and growth patterns for, hair in most depictions, so it might be possible to take hair from one troll and pretend it came from two or more. But it's the best you're likely to come up with shy of dragging all 15 corpses back with you.
Ear wax, as mentioned in another answer, might also be viable (presumably carving out an ear and having it regrow won't have it regrow complete with ear wax build up), though as that answer notes, it can't give an accurate kill count, just a rough estimate (it's like hair, but even easier to subdivide).
There is a flaw with all of these methods: If trolls are smart, they might try to game your troll death metrics by regular grooming; shaving their heads, carving out the inner skin of their own ears (or use q-tips, whatever) every week or so, etc. If you're adventurers looking to make a buck, taking the risk of death fighting trolls that you won't be paid for might seem like a bad deal.
answered Nov 15 at 20:06
ShadowRanger
46927
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6
down vote
Bring full body vids including yourself knifing thru the heart & slitting throat of the orc, pre or post-mortem, along with an accompanying dna swab. He checks.
That should do the trick.
answered Nov 13 at 18:40
theRiley
1,41514
Those squeamish adventures don't want to cut bits off, but are fine to have a photo shoot slicing and dicing?
– Kain0_0
Nov 14 at 7:57
they wanted proof, they have proof. :) or just the dna, if the videoz are too unpleasant. but between the two, that proof is indisputable.
– theRiley
Nov 14 at 8:05
Good point, and any squeamish adventurer who adventures can certainly find an already dead troll.
– Kain0_0
Nov 14 at 8:27
add a comment |
up vote
6
down vote
Get a referee / mentor to join your quest.
You may bring 15 troll ears, 20 tusks and 1 gallon of ear wax BUT:
Was it really you who did the work, or did you buy yourself through a gift shop down the street or worse, did you let others do the dirty work?
This is why the Guild of of Adventurers Anonymous provides a referee or a mentor for every one who goes on such an honorable quest of slaying innocent trolls.
The referee writes down every troll you killed and even how you killed them, because there are more than one way to kill a troll and not all of them are favoured by your guild.
answered Nov 14 at 10:49
Alexander von Wernherr
3,6611032
add a comment |
up vote
5
down vote
Get the trolls to chase you
Place the NPC at the top of a safe tower or other natural defence.
Dig a ditch of spikes and cover with branches and leaves. Leave one place where it's easy for you to cross but make sure it looks no different from the rest of the concealed ditch apart from an odd shaped branch.
Find a band of trolls.
Get them to chase you.
Keep shouting insults to enrage them but run just fast enough to keep ahead.
Run until you get to where the NPC is waiting.
Cross the concealed spiked ditch, turn to face the oncoming horde and shout your worst insults whilst making rude hand-gestures.
Watch as the trolls fall into the ditch and impale themselves.
Kill any that manage to cross the narrow concealed bridge by knocking them off it in the manner of Little John and Robin Hood. Shoot stragglers who didn't quite reach the ditch with your bow.
Collect your reward.
This also has the advantage of being re-usable. Make sure no-one lives to tell the tale and you can use the same trick repeatedly.
answered Nov 14 at 9:18
chasly from UK
6,38222963
add a comment |
up vote
5
down vote
Do your trolls live in caves?
Wait until the troll goes to sleep after a long day of pillaging villages and farmsteads. *(Usually an adventurer's first instinct is to swoop-in and save the day before another village gets looted, but you have to remember to be patient here)
Roll a giant bolder to the cave entrance. Make sure it's properly secured so the troll can't get out. (Maybe bring some mortar with you just in case...)
Wait a year and then come back to the cave. By this time the troll should have run out of food in the cave and starved to death.
You now have an intact troll body (or more if he had a wife and kids in the cave), with body-parts that you can say came from multiple trolls, you've also got troll weapons and troll clothes as further proof for whatever you want.
answered Nov 14 at 10:40
IKM
512
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IKM is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
add a comment |
up vote
5
down vote
Depends on your way of killing the trolls without blood, But if there is no modern technology around and going livestream while killing trolls is not possible, then let the troll come to you.
1) Lure the troll near the town
2) Kill the troll
3) Get Rewarded
All of the above answers(skinning the troll, ripping parts of the troll, etc..) could be bypassed by just either waiting for a troll to die, or searching for a dead troll, or making trolls fight each other, take the token and present it. My approach will make sure YOU did it, and the whole town witnessed you kill the trolls.
How you do it without blood is way beyond me, I cant seem to picture killing something without blood.
answered Nov 15 at 7:55
Mr.J
1,538629
add a comment |
up vote
4
down vote
- Help my cute elf! You must be female elf. I am sure there will be army of ready help.
- Photo - No magic selfies or too expensive?
- In name of my honor! Trolls are no more! Magic and divine oaths.
- For for reasonable pay, guild verifies kills: sending extra with you or after job is done, while your pay is pending.
- Get troll weapons or whatever your trolls have. Poor trolls.
answered Nov 13 at 20:42
Artemijs Danilovs
3545
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Artemijs Danilovs is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
add a comment |
up vote
4
down vote
Take their Mojo
Adult trolls (or at least, the Warcraft variety) have their own special form of magic (Voodoo in Warcraft terms) that requires a special bag of charms (A liquid in Warcraft), called a Mojo. A troll will never willingly part with their Mojo while they are alive, and all trolls carry Mojo, so there is a one to one relationship between a Mojo and a troll. It doesn't require any severing of limbs, nor cutting of body parts to harvest, and it's relatively easy to carry. It's also hard to make a forgery, because it's infused with the troll's personal Voodoo magic.
answered Nov 15 at 13:40
Nzall
4,97112261
This also allows all kinds of options for fun quests helping trolls regain their lost mojo.
– Dewi Morgan
Nov 15 at 16:43
add a comment |
up vote
4
down vote
Insurance. No really.
Where there is money exchanging hands, there is risk. Where there is risk and money exchanging hands, there is always someone looking to make money from this.
Have your reward payers set the value of killed troll through investment from those who wish to see the trolls gone. Have this value be underwritten by insurers. Only troll kills which can be verified by an agent of the underwriters will count. This causes the troll hunters to pay to bring along a verified agent of the insurance agency. This Agent also collects a salary based on how few trolls are killed.
If he lies by reducing the number, he can rest assured the next troll hunt will either see him not being brought along or being used as "accidental" bait. If he lies by increasing the number, he will be paid less in his salary. Finding this value to reduce the chance of bribery is a big part of insurance.
If he tells the truth, the troll hunters are happy that he isn't taking money away from them. The insurance company is happy because their books balance. And the investors are happy because there are less trolls running around.
Edit: Also forgot that the same insurers will be offering life insurance policies and workmen's compensation options to the troll hunters. Heck, they can even offer insurance for poor hunting years.
answered Nov 15 at 11:26
ColonelPanic
2,882314
add a comment |
up vote
3
down vote
Troll Semen
With genocidal adventurers constantly picking off trolls to improve their status in society it would be necessary for societies to engage in conservational efforts to stabilize the troll populations.
Seeing as how there are adventurers who do not wish to return traditional socially rewarding trophies they can be used to instead return materials useful in conservation efforts.
Using a syringe an adventurer could harvest the eggs or semen from dead trolls. Because they are dead their blood flow has stopped so sticking them with a needle will not result in any significant spray that could get on them.
The eggs and semen could then be used to artificially impregnate captive trolls thereby replacing their population.
answered Nov 14 at 16:19
anon
10.2k1357
add a comment |
up vote
3
down vote
Livestream it.
Since you didn’t mention anything about your world I’m going to assume a similar world to ours. If it is a less technologically advanced world then figure out a magic livestream that people can watch in some specifically built theater.
You’re an adventurer with the equivalence of a live gaming Youtube stream. Thousands of peasants watch you (and others) ridding the world of those pesky trolls. Sometimes the adventurers die horribly in the process, which makes it even more entertaining.
answered Nov 15 at 2:50
Sebastiaan van den Broek
1413
add a comment |
up vote
2
down vote
Let's assume that an ear is enough proof you've killed a troll. Your adventures could just hire an NPC who waits till the fight is over, then cuts off the ears of the dead trolls and put them into a chest, half filled with sand (the sand will keep any blood from dripping out of the box). Then all the adventurers need to do is present the chest to whoever asked for 15 trolls.
Of course, if the adventurers have a DEX above 6, it shouldn't be too hard for them to cut of ears without getting blood on them.
I'm far more interested how they plan to kill 15 trolls without getting blood on them.
answered Nov 14 at 23:16
Abigail
1,399314
add a comment |
up vote
2
down vote
Bury the dead trolls by anthills, termite mounds, or other scavenger insects. Come back in a year or so when the trollskull is clean and hand that in.
Alternatively, boil the trolls, the trollflesh will fall right off, again you get clean skulls and bones, as well as rendered trollfat and other usable parts.
Maybe a bit stinky though, if you're not gonna clean the bodies before boiling. You'll be basically boiling the bodies in a vat of trollcrap.
answered Nov 14 at 21:57
Dewi Morgan
4,434928
add a comment |
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27 Answers
27
active
oldest
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27 Answers
27
active
oldest
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active
oldest
votes
active
oldest
votes
up vote
34
down vote
accepted
Hire or Enslave a worker to do the dirty work for you
Surely there are poor unskilled people who you can pay on the cheap to do the dirty work of carrying and harvesting your trophy body parts. Best part is now you can remain unencumbered should you be ambushed. This also increases your inventory as the worker can carry supplies too.
If the worker is too expensive or scared of the job
Slavery works too!
Capture a goblin or something and make him do the work. Chain his neck so he cant run. Be careful as he may try to kill you in your sleep. Though, if you are a decent adventurer you will sleep cautiously anyways (keeps ya on your toes).
answered Nov 13 at 19:16
anon
10.2k1357
1
This seems like the answer medieval society would come up with, this is the same society that paid people to eat your sins.
– John
Nov 15 at 23:38
add a comment |
up vote
34
down vote
accepted
Hire or Enslave a worker to do the dirty work for you
Surely there are poor unskilled people who you can pay on the cheap to do the dirty work of carrying and harvesting your trophy body parts. Best part is now you can remain unencumbered should you be ambushed. This also increases your inventory as the worker can carry supplies too.
If the worker is too expensive or scared of the job
Slavery works too!
Capture a goblin or something and make him do the work. Chain his neck so he cant run. Be careful as he may try to kill you in your sleep. Though, if you are a decent adventurer you will sleep cautiously anyways (keeps ya on your toes).
answered Nov 13 at 19:16
anon
10.2k1357
1
This seems like the answer medieval society would come up with, this is the same society that paid people to eat your sins.
– John
Nov 15 at 23:38
add a comment |
up vote
34
down vote
accepted
up vote
34
down vote
accepted
Hire or Enslave a worker to do the dirty work for you
Surely there are poor unskilled people who you can pay on the cheap to do the dirty work of carrying and harvesting your trophy body parts. Best part is now you can remain unencumbered should you be ambushed. This also increases your inventory as the worker can carry supplies too.
If the worker is too expensive or scared of the job
Slavery works too!
Capture a goblin or something and make him do the work. Chain his neck so he cant run. Be careful as he may try to kill you in your sleep. Though, if you are a decent adventurer you will sleep cautiously anyways (keeps ya on your toes).
answered Nov 13 at 19:16
anon
10.2k1357
Hire or Enslave a worker to do the dirty work for you
Surely there are poor unskilled people who you can pay on the cheap to do the dirty work of carrying and harvesting your trophy body parts. Best part is now you can remain unencumbered should you be ambushed. This also increases your inventory as the worker can carry supplies too.
If the worker is too expensive or scared of the job
Slavery works too!
Capture a goblin or something and make him do the work. Chain his neck so he cant run. Be careful as he may try to kill you in your sleep. Though, if you are a decent adventurer you will sleep cautiously anyways (keeps ya on your toes).
answered Nov 13 at 19:16
anon
10.2k1357
edited Nov 13 at 21:20
answered Nov 13 at 19:16
anon
10.2k1357
answered Nov 13 at 19:16
anon
10.2k1357
answered Nov 13 at 19:16
anon
10.2k1357
10.2k1357
1
This seems like the answer medieval society would come up with, this is the same society that paid people to eat your sins.
– John
Nov 15 at 23:38
add a comment |
1
This seems like the answer medieval society would come up with, this is the same society that paid people to eat your sins.
– John
Nov 15 at 23:38
1
1
This seems like the answer medieval society would come up with, this is the same society that paid people to eat your sins.
– John
Nov 15 at 23:38
This seems like the answer medieval society would come up with, this is the same society that paid people to eat your sins.
– John
Nov 15 at 23:38
add a comment |
up vote
51
down vote
Cut off their tusks
Fortunately, trolls have tusks. Cutting the end off of tusks takes a bit of work, but there is no blood involved, so it is suitable even for the squeamish.
Note, horns are keratin over bone. Tusks are overgrown teeth. Troll tusks won't bleed.
answered Nov 13 at 18:39
kingledion
70.1k24235407
14
As someone who has witnessed the cutting of cow horns, let me tell you, they bleed and freakishly so. There is no guarantee that a troll tusk would not bleed unless you took the very tip. But if you only took the tip who is to say it came from a troll and not something like a boar.
– anon
Nov 13 at 20:08
17
@anon Horns are keratin over bone. Tusks are overgrown teeth. Troll tusks won't bleed. Hopefully, they have a unique smell they can be identified by. Hopefully.
– kingledion
Nov 13 at 20:45
30
It they pay enough for "killing the trolls", I'm sure some entrepreneurs will start breeding trolls in captivity so they can sell their tusks. There are stories about similar things happening with snakes in India.
– vsz
Nov 14 at 5:31
6
@vsz or rat farms in Thailand.
– Harper
Nov 14 at 7:35
8
Tips of tusks grow back in most species. Tusks exist for most species as tools and are therefore constantly growing. Cutting in to the root (and hence blood) will cause the tooth to die, but is against the OP's request. Basically, this will incentivize down-and-out trolls to sell some tusk tips. Or as others have pointed out, to have others start troll farms.
– ColonelPanic
Nov 14 at 10:43
|
show 13 more comments
up vote
51
down vote
Cut off their tusks
Fortunately, trolls have tusks. Cutting the end off of tusks takes a bit of work, but there is no blood involved, so it is suitable even for the squeamish.
Note, horns are keratin over bone. Tusks are overgrown teeth. Troll tusks won't bleed.
answered Nov 13 at 18:39
kingledion
70.1k24235407
14
As someone who has witnessed the cutting of cow horns, let me tell you, they bleed and freakishly so. There is no guarantee that a troll tusk would not bleed unless you took the very tip. But if you only took the tip who is to say it came from a troll and not something like a boar.
– anon
Nov 13 at 20:08
17
@anon Horns are keratin over bone. Tusks are overgrown teeth. Troll tusks won't bleed. Hopefully, they have a unique smell they can be identified by. Hopefully.
– kingledion
Nov 13 at 20:45
30
It they pay enough for "killing the trolls", I'm sure some entrepreneurs will start breeding trolls in captivity so they can sell their tusks. There are stories about similar things happening with snakes in India.
– vsz
Nov 14 at 5:31
6
@vsz or rat farms in Thailand.
– Harper
Nov 14 at 7:35
8
Tips of tusks grow back in most species. Tusks exist for most species as tools and are therefore constantly growing. Cutting in to the root (and hence blood) will cause the tooth to die, but is against the OP's request. Basically, this will incentivize down-and-out trolls to sell some tusk tips. Or as others have pointed out, to have others start troll farms.
– ColonelPanic
Nov 14 at 10:43
|
show 13 more comments
up vote
51
down vote
up vote
51
down vote
Cut off their tusks
Fortunately, trolls have tusks. Cutting the end off of tusks takes a bit of work, but there is no blood involved, so it is suitable even for the squeamish.
Note, horns are keratin over bone. Tusks are overgrown teeth. Troll tusks won't bleed.
answered Nov 13 at 18:39
kingledion
70.1k24235407
Cut off their tusks
Fortunately, trolls have tusks. Cutting the end off of tusks takes a bit of work, but there is no blood involved, so it is suitable even for the squeamish.
Note, horns are keratin over bone. Tusks are overgrown teeth. Troll tusks won't bleed.
answered Nov 13 at 18:39
kingledion
70.1k24235407
edited Nov 13 at 20:47
answered Nov 13 at 18:39
kingledion
70.1k24235407
answered Nov 13 at 18:39
kingledion
70.1k24235407
answered Nov 13 at 18:39
kingledion
70.1k24235407
70.1k24235407
14
As someone who has witnessed the cutting of cow horns, let me tell you, they bleed and freakishly so. There is no guarantee that a troll tusk would not bleed unless you took the very tip. But if you only took the tip who is to say it came from a troll and not something like a boar.
– anon
Nov 13 at 20:08
17
@anon Horns are keratin over bone. Tusks are overgrown teeth. Troll tusks won't bleed. Hopefully, they have a unique smell they can be identified by. Hopefully.
– kingledion
Nov 13 at 20:45
30
It they pay enough for "killing the trolls", I'm sure some entrepreneurs will start breeding trolls in captivity so they can sell their tusks. There are stories about similar things happening with snakes in India.
– vsz
Nov 14 at 5:31
6
@vsz or rat farms in Thailand.
– Harper
Nov 14 at 7:35
8
Tips of tusks grow back in most species. Tusks exist for most species as tools and are therefore constantly growing. Cutting in to the root (and hence blood) will cause the tooth to die, but is against the OP's request. Basically, this will incentivize down-and-out trolls to sell some tusk tips. Or as others have pointed out, to have others start troll farms.
– ColonelPanic
Nov 14 at 10:43
|
show 13 more comments
14
As someone who has witnessed the cutting of cow horns, let me tell you, they bleed and freakishly so. There is no guarantee that a troll tusk would not bleed unless you took the very tip. But if you only took the tip who is to say it came from a troll and not something like a boar.
– anon
Nov 13 at 20:08
17
@anon Horns are keratin over bone. Tusks are overgrown teeth. Troll tusks won't bleed. Hopefully, they have a unique smell they can be identified by. Hopefully.
– kingledion
Nov 13 at 20:45
30
It they pay enough for "killing the trolls", I'm sure some entrepreneurs will start breeding trolls in captivity so they can sell their tusks. There are stories about similar things happening with snakes in India.
– vsz
Nov 14 at 5:31
6
@vsz or rat farms in Thailand.
– Harper
Nov 14 at 7:35
8
Tips of tusks grow back in most species. Tusks exist for most species as tools and are therefore constantly growing. Cutting in to the root (and hence blood) will cause the tooth to die, but is against the OP's request. Basically, this will incentivize down-and-out trolls to sell some tusk tips. Or as others have pointed out, to have others start troll farms.
– ColonelPanic
Nov 14 at 10:43
14
14
As someone who has witnessed the cutting of cow horns, let me tell you, they bleed and freakishly so. There is no guarantee that a troll tusk would not bleed unless you took the very tip. But if you only took the tip who is to say it came from a troll and not something like a boar.
– anon
Nov 13 at 20:08
As someone who has witnessed the cutting of cow horns, let me tell you, they bleed and freakishly so. There is no guarantee that a troll tusk would not bleed unless you took the very tip. But if you only took the tip who is to say it came from a troll and not something like a boar.
– anon
Nov 13 at 20:08
17
17
@anon Horns are keratin over bone. Tusks are overgrown teeth. Troll tusks won't bleed. Hopefully, they have a unique smell they can be identified by. Hopefully.
– kingledion
Nov 13 at 20:45
@anon Horns are keratin over bone. Tusks are overgrown teeth. Troll tusks won't bleed. Hopefully, they have a unique smell they can be identified by. Hopefully.
– kingledion
Nov 13 at 20:45
30
30
It they pay enough for "killing the trolls", I'm sure some entrepreneurs will start breeding trolls in captivity so they can sell their tusks. There are stories about similar things happening with snakes in India.
– vsz
Nov 14 at 5:31
It they pay enough for "killing the trolls", I'm sure some entrepreneurs will start breeding trolls in captivity so they can sell their tusks. There are stories about similar things happening with snakes in India.
– vsz
Nov 14 at 5:31
6
6
@vsz or rat farms in Thailand.
– Harper
Nov 14 at 7:35
@vsz or rat farms in Thailand.
– Harper
Nov 14 at 7:35
8
8
Tips of tusks grow back in most species. Tusks exist for most species as tools and are therefore constantly growing. Cutting in to the root (and hence blood) will cause the tooth to die, but is against the OP's request. Basically, this will incentivize down-and-out trolls to sell some tusk tips. Or as others have pointed out, to have others start troll farms.
– ColonelPanic
Nov 14 at 10:43
Tips of tusks grow back in most species. Tusks exist for most species as tools and are therefore constantly growing. Cutting in to the root (and hence blood) will cause the tooth to die, but is against the OP's request. Basically, this will incentivize down-and-out trolls to sell some tusk tips. Or as others have pointed out, to have others start troll farms.
– ColonelPanic
Nov 14 at 10:43
|
show 13 more comments
up vote
28
down vote
Fine, Strip them and Bring their crotch straps back
-Trolls wear loin clothes at least
-Trolls aren't hygienic so it would be hard to forge multiple used troll crotch straps
-So if they really press whether they are real or not you can tell the NPC to smell them and find out.
answered Nov 13 at 18:34
anon
10.2k1357
18
Tough luck if you have to destroy the troll nudist camp down at the beach though.
– AmiralPatate
Nov 14 at 6:55
2
@Shadowzee "Baring a body part unique to a troll"? Ew.
– Rand al'Thor
Nov 14 at 7:43
9
Easily defrauded: Go to the troll camp and trade for their dirty laundry. Or kill one troll, then go to its home and collect all its other loincloths from wherever they're stored while not being worn. No matter how unhygienic trolls may be, they are unlikely to have only a single loincloth.
– Dave Sherohman
Nov 14 at 10:05
1
@DaveSherohman Troll mythology rarely depicts such advanced behavior like communities to trade with or a troll having a wardrobe in which they change clothes. So adding such possibilities would be creative choice to directly defeat this idea which is unreasonable. In most classical depictions of troll dwellings theres actually very little in the way of creature comforts especially changes in clothes, which reinforces the notion that they never do change their clothes making loin cloths unique to the troll.
– anon
Nov 14 at 13:48
1
@Shadowzee The girth and design/ornamentation could indicate species even regional variations. Different animals smell differently matter of fact dogs have keenly picked up on this and could be used to spot counterfeits.
– anon
Nov 14 at 15:21
|
show 3 more comments
up vote
28
down vote
Fine, Strip them and Bring their crotch straps back
-Trolls wear loin clothes at least
-Trolls aren't hygienic so it would be hard to forge multiple used troll crotch straps
-So if they really press whether they are real or not you can tell the NPC to smell them and find out.
answered Nov 13 at 18:34
anon
10.2k1357
18
Tough luck if you have to destroy the troll nudist camp down at the beach though.
– AmiralPatate
Nov 14 at 6:55
2
@Shadowzee "Baring a body part unique to a troll"? Ew.
– Rand al'Thor
Nov 14 at 7:43
9
Easily defrauded: Go to the troll camp and trade for their dirty laundry. Or kill one troll, then go to its home and collect all its other loincloths from wherever they're stored while not being worn. No matter how unhygienic trolls may be, they are unlikely to have only a single loincloth.
– Dave Sherohman
Nov 14 at 10:05
1
@DaveSherohman Troll mythology rarely depicts such advanced behavior like communities to trade with or a troll having a wardrobe in which they change clothes. So adding such possibilities would be creative choice to directly defeat this idea which is unreasonable. In most classical depictions of troll dwellings theres actually very little in the way of creature comforts especially changes in clothes, which reinforces the notion that they never do change their clothes making loin cloths unique to the troll.
– anon
Nov 14 at 13:48
1
@Shadowzee The girth and design/ornamentation could indicate species even regional variations. Different animals smell differently matter of fact dogs have keenly picked up on this and could be used to spot counterfeits.
– anon
Nov 14 at 15:21
|
show 3 more comments
up vote
28
down vote
up vote
28
down vote
Fine, Strip them and Bring their crotch straps back
-Trolls wear loin clothes at least
-Trolls aren't hygienic so it would be hard to forge multiple used troll crotch straps
-So if they really press whether they are real or not you can tell the NPC to smell them and find out.
answered Nov 13 at 18:34
anon
10.2k1357
Fine, Strip them and Bring their crotch straps back
-Trolls wear loin clothes at least
-Trolls aren't hygienic so it would be hard to forge multiple used troll crotch straps
-So if they really press whether they are real or not you can tell the NPC to smell them and find out.
answered Nov 13 at 18:34
anon
10.2k1357
edited Nov 13 at 20:50
answered Nov 13 at 18:34
anon
10.2k1357
answered Nov 13 at 18:34
anon
10.2k1357
answered Nov 13 at 18:34
anon
10.2k1357
10.2k1357
18
Tough luck if you have to destroy the troll nudist camp down at the beach though.
– AmiralPatate
Nov 14 at 6:55
2
@Shadowzee "Baring a body part unique to a troll"? Ew.
– Rand al'Thor
Nov 14 at 7:43
9
Easily defrauded: Go to the troll camp and trade for their dirty laundry. Or kill one troll, then go to its home and collect all its other loincloths from wherever they're stored while not being worn. No matter how unhygienic trolls may be, they are unlikely to have only a single loincloth.
– Dave Sherohman
Nov 14 at 10:05
1
@DaveSherohman Troll mythology rarely depicts such advanced behavior like communities to trade with or a troll having a wardrobe in which they change clothes. So adding such possibilities would be creative choice to directly defeat this idea which is unreasonable. In most classical depictions of troll dwellings theres actually very little in the way of creature comforts especially changes in clothes, which reinforces the notion that they never do change their clothes making loin cloths unique to the troll.
– anon
Nov 14 at 13:48
1
@Shadowzee The girth and design/ornamentation could indicate species even regional variations. Different animals smell differently matter of fact dogs have keenly picked up on this and could be used to spot counterfeits.
– anon
Nov 14 at 15:21
|
show 3 more comments
18
Tough luck if you have to destroy the troll nudist camp down at the beach though.
– AmiralPatate
Nov 14 at 6:55
2
@Shadowzee "Baring a body part unique to a troll"? Ew.
– Rand al'Thor
Nov 14 at 7:43
9
Easily defrauded: Go to the troll camp and trade for their dirty laundry. Or kill one troll, then go to its home and collect all its other loincloths from wherever they're stored while not being worn. No matter how unhygienic trolls may be, they are unlikely to have only a single loincloth.
– Dave Sherohman
Nov 14 at 10:05
1
@DaveSherohman Troll mythology rarely depicts such advanced behavior like communities to trade with or a troll having a wardrobe in which they change clothes. So adding such possibilities would be creative choice to directly defeat this idea which is unreasonable. In most classical depictions of troll dwellings theres actually very little in the way of creature comforts especially changes in clothes, which reinforces the notion that they never do change their clothes making loin cloths unique to the troll.
– anon
Nov 14 at 13:48
1
@Shadowzee The girth and design/ornamentation could indicate species even regional variations. Different animals smell differently matter of fact dogs have keenly picked up on this and could be used to spot counterfeits.
– anon
Nov 14 at 15:21
18
18
Tough luck if you have to destroy the troll nudist camp down at the beach though.
– AmiralPatate
Nov 14 at 6:55
Tough luck if you have to destroy the troll nudist camp down at the beach though.
– AmiralPatate
Nov 14 at 6:55
2
2
@Shadowzee "Baring a body part unique to a troll"? Ew.
– Rand al'Thor
Nov 14 at 7:43
@Shadowzee "Baring a body part unique to a troll"? Ew.
– Rand al'Thor
Nov 14 at 7:43
9
9
Easily defrauded: Go to the troll camp and trade for their dirty laundry. Or kill one troll, then go to its home and collect all its other loincloths from wherever they're stored while not being worn. No matter how unhygienic trolls may be, they are unlikely to have only a single loincloth.
– Dave Sherohman
Nov 14 at 10:05
Easily defrauded: Go to the troll camp and trade for their dirty laundry. Or kill one troll, then go to its home and collect all its other loincloths from wherever they're stored while not being worn. No matter how unhygienic trolls may be, they are unlikely to have only a single loincloth.
– Dave Sherohman
Nov 14 at 10:05
1
1
@DaveSherohman Troll mythology rarely depicts such advanced behavior like communities to trade with or a troll having a wardrobe in which they change clothes. So adding such possibilities would be creative choice to directly defeat this idea which is unreasonable. In most classical depictions of troll dwellings theres actually very little in the way of creature comforts especially changes in clothes, which reinforces the notion that they never do change their clothes making loin cloths unique to the troll.
– anon
Nov 14 at 13:48
@DaveSherohman Troll mythology rarely depicts such advanced behavior like communities to trade with or a troll having a wardrobe in which they change clothes. So adding such possibilities would be creative choice to directly defeat this idea which is unreasonable. In most classical depictions of troll dwellings theres actually very little in the way of creature comforts especially changes in clothes, which reinforces the notion that they never do change their clothes making loin cloths unique to the troll.
– anon
Nov 14 at 13:48
1
1
@Shadowzee The girth and design/ornamentation could indicate species even regional variations. Different animals smell differently matter of fact dogs have keenly picked up on this and could be used to spot counterfeits.
– anon
Nov 14 at 15:21
@Shadowzee The girth and design/ornamentation could indicate species even regional variations. Different animals smell differently matter of fact dogs have keenly picked up on this and could be used to spot counterfeits.
– anon
Nov 14 at 15:21
|
show 3 more comments
up vote
24
down vote
Get hold of a couple of palantirs palantiri. The NPC can watch the live action.
answered Nov 13 at 19:10
chasly from UK
6,38222963
add a comment |
up vote
24
down vote
Get hold of a couple of palantirs palantiri. The NPC can watch the live action.
answered Nov 13 at 19:10
chasly from UK
6,38222963
add a comment |
up vote
24
down vote
up vote
24
down vote
Get hold of a couple of palantirs palantiri. The NPC can watch the live action.
answered Nov 13 at 19:10
chasly from UK
6,38222963
Get hold of a couple of palantirs palantiri. The NPC can watch the live action.
answered Nov 13 at 19:10
chasly from UK
6,38222963
edited 2 days ago
answered Nov 13 at 19:10
chasly from UK
6,38222963
answered Nov 13 at 19:10
chasly from UK
6,38222963
answered Nov 13 at 19:10
chasly from UK
6,38222963
6,38222963
add a comment |
add a comment |
up vote
23
down vote
Necromancy
Why cut off a ear when you can kill two trolls with one spell? You could get your hands dirty cutting off ears, and the quest giver might still suspect you made fake ears. It'd take a brave person to accuse you of making 15 fake zombie trolls. Even if the contract requires you to remove the ears (and you are the lawful sort), you could keep your own hands clean and just get your zombie minions to remove each other's ears. If after all that they still refuse to pay... well then you have 16 pet zombies. It is win-win!
answered Nov 14 at 7:14
gmatht
2,7741611
add a comment |
up vote
23
down vote
Necromancy
Why cut off a ear when you can kill two trolls with one spell? You could get your hands dirty cutting off ears, and the quest giver might still suspect you made fake ears. It'd take a brave person to accuse you of making 15 fake zombie trolls. Even if the contract requires you to remove the ears (and you are the lawful sort), you could keep your own hands clean and just get your zombie minions to remove each other's ears. If after all that they still refuse to pay... well then you have 16 pet zombies. It is win-win!
answered Nov 14 at 7:14
gmatht
2,7741611
add a comment |
up vote
23
down vote
up vote
23
down vote
Necromancy
Why cut off a ear when you can kill two trolls with one spell? You could get your hands dirty cutting off ears, and the quest giver might still suspect you made fake ears. It'd take a brave person to accuse you of making 15 fake zombie trolls. Even if the contract requires you to remove the ears (and you are the lawful sort), you could keep your own hands clean and just get your zombie minions to remove each other's ears. If after all that they still refuse to pay... well then you have 16 pet zombies. It is win-win!
answered Nov 14 at 7:14
gmatht
2,7741611
Necromancy
Why cut off a ear when you can kill two trolls with one spell? You could get your hands dirty cutting off ears, and the quest giver might still suspect you made fake ears. It'd take a brave person to accuse you of making 15 fake zombie trolls. Even if the contract requires you to remove the ears (and you are the lawful sort), you could keep your own hands clean and just get your zombie minions to remove each other's ears. If after all that they still refuse to pay... well then you have 16 pet zombies. It is win-win!
answered Nov 14 at 7:14
gmatht
2,7741611
edited Nov 16 at 20:20
answered Nov 14 at 7:14
gmatht
2,7741611
answered Nov 14 at 7:14
gmatht
2,7741611
answered Nov 14 at 7:14
gmatht
2,7741611
2,7741611
add a comment |
add a comment |
up vote
18
down vote
Assert you did.
Thrash up your stuff and bloody your sword. Go back to the dude. Yell "I KILLED TROLLLLLS!" Let the residual battle frenzy gleam in your eye. Make sure he understands you have suffered much brain damage from many fights over your life, but if anything that has increased your 99 strength.
If he starts laying conditions and caveats on you, become angry. If he says you did not follow the instructions, show him the blood on your weapons and yell about trolls.
He will offer you half pay to leave and not come back. He will apologetically explain he needed the troll parts which is why it is just half pay, but he feels bad about wasting your time. Take the money in exchange for him conceding that you killed the trolls. Give him a tip with his own money for saying it.
answered Nov 13 at 19:15
Willk
97.1k25188409
26
Knowing some games/stories, you are actually threatening the retired legendary dragon slayer who single handedly saved the entire continent from an apocalyptic doom and is now retired and guiding new adventurers from behind the scenes.
– Shadowzee
Nov 14 at 3:44
2
Go into merchant store, talk about getting paid for not doing your work. Showing you are an adventurer. Getting a strait in your head. Every merchant have loaded crossbow under the counter just for the people like you.
– SZCZERZO KŁY
Nov 14 at 14:47
1
Given the adventurers in question are squeamish about handling blood, I can only assume the substance coating their weapons is actually barbecue sauce. (The dumb ones use ketchup, but are easily caught out as it dries too bright a shade.)
– jmbpiano
Nov 15 at 23:47
1
This looks like something out of interpersonal or workplace stack exchange :)
– Mad Physicist
yesterday
add a comment |
up vote
18
down vote
Assert you did.
Thrash up your stuff and bloody your sword. Go back to the dude. Yell "I KILLED TROLLLLLS!" Let the residual battle frenzy gleam in your eye. Make sure he understands you have suffered much brain damage from many fights over your life, but if anything that has increased your 99 strength.
If he starts laying conditions and caveats on you, become angry. If he says you did not follow the instructions, show him the blood on your weapons and yell about trolls.
He will offer you half pay to leave and not come back. He will apologetically explain he needed the troll parts which is why it is just half pay, but he feels bad about wasting your time. Take the money in exchange for him conceding that you killed the trolls. Give him a tip with his own money for saying it.
answered Nov 13 at 19:15
Willk
97.1k25188409
26
Knowing some games/stories, you are actually threatening the retired legendary dragon slayer who single handedly saved the entire continent from an apocalyptic doom and is now retired and guiding new adventurers from behind the scenes.
– Shadowzee
Nov 14 at 3:44
2
Go into merchant store, talk about getting paid for not doing your work. Showing you are an adventurer. Getting a strait in your head. Every merchant have loaded crossbow under the counter just for the people like you.
– SZCZERZO KŁY
Nov 14 at 14:47
1
Given the adventurers in question are squeamish about handling blood, I can only assume the substance coating their weapons is actually barbecue sauce. (The dumb ones use ketchup, but are easily caught out as it dries too bright a shade.)
– jmbpiano
Nov 15 at 23:47
1
This looks like something out of interpersonal or workplace stack exchange :)
– Mad Physicist
yesterday
add a comment |
up vote
18
down vote
up vote
18
down vote
Assert you did.
Thrash up your stuff and bloody your sword. Go back to the dude. Yell "I KILLED TROLLLLLS!" Let the residual battle frenzy gleam in your eye. Make sure he understands you have suffered much brain damage from many fights over your life, but if anything that has increased your 99 strength.
If he starts laying conditions and caveats on you, become angry. If he says you did not follow the instructions, show him the blood on your weapons and yell about trolls.
He will offer you half pay to leave and not come back. He will apologetically explain he needed the troll parts which is why it is just half pay, but he feels bad about wasting your time. Take the money in exchange for him conceding that you killed the trolls. Give him a tip with his own money for saying it.
answered Nov 13 at 19:15
Willk
97.1k25188409
Assert you did.
Thrash up your stuff and bloody your sword. Go back to the dude. Yell "I KILLED TROLLLLLS!" Let the residual battle frenzy gleam in your eye. Make sure he understands you have suffered much brain damage from many fights over your life, but if anything that has increased your 99 strength.
If he starts laying conditions and caveats on you, become angry. If he says you did not follow the instructions, show him the blood on your weapons and yell about trolls.
He will offer you half pay to leave and not come back. He will apologetically explain he needed the troll parts which is why it is just half pay, but he feels bad about wasting your time. Take the money in exchange for him conceding that you killed the trolls. Give him a tip with his own money for saying it.
answered Nov 13 at 19:15
Willk
97.1k25188409
answered Nov 13 at 19:15
Willk
97.1k25188409
answered Nov 13 at 19:15
Willk
97.1k25188409
answered Nov 13 at 19:15
Willk
97.1k25188409
97.1k25188409
26
Knowing some games/stories, you are actually threatening the retired legendary dragon slayer who single handedly saved the entire continent from an apocalyptic doom and is now retired and guiding new adventurers from behind the scenes.
– Shadowzee
Nov 14 at 3:44
2
Go into merchant store, talk about getting paid for not doing your work. Showing you are an adventurer. Getting a strait in your head. Every merchant have loaded crossbow under the counter just for the people like you.
– SZCZERZO KŁY
Nov 14 at 14:47
1
Given the adventurers in question are squeamish about handling blood, I can only assume the substance coating their weapons is actually barbecue sauce. (The dumb ones use ketchup, but are easily caught out as it dries too bright a shade.)
– jmbpiano
Nov 15 at 23:47
1
This looks like something out of interpersonal or workplace stack exchange :)
– Mad Physicist
yesterday
add a comment |
26
Knowing some games/stories, you are actually threatening the retired legendary dragon slayer who single handedly saved the entire continent from an apocalyptic doom and is now retired and guiding new adventurers from behind the scenes.
– Shadowzee
Nov 14 at 3:44
2
Go into merchant store, talk about getting paid for not doing your work. Showing you are an adventurer. Getting a strait in your head. Every merchant have loaded crossbow under the counter just for the people like you.
– SZCZERZO KŁY
Nov 14 at 14:47
1
Given the adventurers in question are squeamish about handling blood, I can only assume the substance coating their weapons is actually barbecue sauce. (The dumb ones use ketchup, but are easily caught out as it dries too bright a shade.)
– jmbpiano
Nov 15 at 23:47
1
This looks like something out of interpersonal or workplace stack exchange :)
– Mad Physicist
yesterday
26
26
Knowing some games/stories, you are actually threatening the retired legendary dragon slayer who single handedly saved the entire continent from an apocalyptic doom and is now retired and guiding new adventurers from behind the scenes.
– Shadowzee
Nov 14 at 3:44
Knowing some games/stories, you are actually threatening the retired legendary dragon slayer who single handedly saved the entire continent from an apocalyptic doom and is now retired and guiding new adventurers from behind the scenes.
– Shadowzee
Nov 14 at 3:44
2
2
Go into merchant store, talk about getting paid for not doing your work. Showing you are an adventurer. Getting a strait in your head. Every merchant have loaded crossbow under the counter just for the people like you.
– SZCZERZO KŁY
Nov 14 at 14:47
Go into merchant store, talk about getting paid for not doing your work. Showing you are an adventurer. Getting a strait in your head. Every merchant have loaded crossbow under the counter just for the people like you.
– SZCZERZO KŁY
Nov 14 at 14:47
1
1
Given the adventurers in question are squeamish about handling blood, I can only assume the substance coating their weapons is actually barbecue sauce. (The dumb ones use ketchup, but are easily caught out as it dries too bright a shade.)
– jmbpiano
Nov 15 at 23:47
Given the adventurers in question are squeamish about handling blood, I can only assume the substance coating their weapons is actually barbecue sauce. (The dumb ones use ketchup, but are easily caught out as it dries too bright a shade.)
– jmbpiano
Nov 15 at 23:47
1
1
This looks like something out of interpersonal or workplace stack exchange :)
– Mad Physicist
yesterday
This looks like something out of interpersonal or workplace stack exchange :)
– Mad Physicist
yesterday
add a comment |
up vote
15
down vote
DOCUMENTATION
All your main char has to do is bring a vial of ink with him/her and also a sheet of paper (hopefully a journal). Assuming your character has the literacy skill > 10, they should be able to read and write.
After your character has slain the trolls, have the character take out some ink and a sheet of paper. Spread the ink over the troll hand and ear. Attach the sheet of paper to the hand and then the ear. The ink marks from hand/ears should be unique to each troll. Now present your slaying documentation to your quest giver and bing bang boom LEVEL UP!
answered Nov 13 at 20:54
Crettig
2,582722
4
I suspect it will be quite hard to tell the difference between imprints from two different trolls, and two imprints from the same troll in different positions.
– Brilliand
Nov 13 at 21:47
4
@Brilliand "All trolls look alike!1!" --- nah
– hiergiltdiestfu
Nov 14 at 8:15
3
This is what I was going to post. If they resemble humans so much, no finger/palm print would match between trolls. To be paid, your print must be verified at the Scotland Bard's National Bureau of Troll Identification. If you bring in a copy, you forfeit your troll hunting rights for life. If it's a legit hand print, you get your gold.
– ColonelPanic
Nov 14 at 10:41
1
Let's say you're to provide left hand/ear prints. Could you over-ink enough to take a right hand/ear print, then use a second sheet of paper to obtain a reverse copy of same? that would let you take out 8 trolls, but have evidence indicating you took out 16. Also - what if a troll is missing their left hand/ear?
– RDFozz
Nov 16 at 20:04
1
@RDFozz I trust the invisible medieval gauntlet of capitalism to find a solution to the counterfeiting problem (a guild of checkers to check for dupes as an example). I was under the impression ever since I was 11 and playing DND that Trolls always regenerate. If that isn't the case, I suppose people would just accept whatever details were available. Supposing they have NO ears or hands, the market probably would deem them as "not harmful" and therefor not worth the normal quest market price.
– Crettig
Nov 16 at 20:12
add a comment |
up vote
15
down vote
DOCUMENTATION
All your main char has to do is bring a vial of ink with him/her and also a sheet of paper (hopefully a journal). Assuming your character has the literacy skill > 10, they should be able to read and write.
After your character has slain the trolls, have the character take out some ink and a sheet of paper. Spread the ink over the troll hand and ear. Attach the sheet of paper to the hand and then the ear. The ink marks from hand/ears should be unique to each troll. Now present your slaying documentation to your quest giver and bing bang boom LEVEL UP!
answered Nov 13 at 20:54
Crettig
2,582722
4
I suspect it will be quite hard to tell the difference between imprints from two different trolls, and two imprints from the same troll in different positions.
– Brilliand
Nov 13 at 21:47
4
@Brilliand "All trolls look alike!1!" --- nah
– hiergiltdiestfu
Nov 14 at 8:15
3
This is what I was going to post. If they resemble humans so much, no finger/palm print would match between trolls. To be paid, your print must be verified at the Scotland Bard's National Bureau of Troll Identification. If you bring in a copy, you forfeit your troll hunting rights for life. If it's a legit hand print, you get your gold.
– ColonelPanic
Nov 14 at 10:41
1
Let's say you're to provide left hand/ear prints. Could you over-ink enough to take a right hand/ear print, then use a second sheet of paper to obtain a reverse copy of same? that would let you take out 8 trolls, but have evidence indicating you took out 16. Also - what if a troll is missing their left hand/ear?
– RDFozz
Nov 16 at 20:04
1
@RDFozz I trust the invisible medieval gauntlet of capitalism to find a solution to the counterfeiting problem (a guild of checkers to check for dupes as an example). I was under the impression ever since I was 11 and playing DND that Trolls always regenerate. If that isn't the case, I suppose people would just accept whatever details were available. Supposing they have NO ears or hands, the market probably would deem them as "not harmful" and therefor not worth the normal quest market price.
– Crettig
Nov 16 at 20:12
add a comment |
up vote
15
down vote
up vote
15
down vote
DOCUMENTATION
All your main char has to do is bring a vial of ink with him/her and also a sheet of paper (hopefully a journal). Assuming your character has the literacy skill > 10, they should be able to read and write.
After your character has slain the trolls, have the character take out some ink and a sheet of paper. Spread the ink over the troll hand and ear. Attach the sheet of paper to the hand and then the ear. The ink marks from hand/ears should be unique to each troll. Now present your slaying documentation to your quest giver and bing bang boom LEVEL UP!
answered Nov 13 at 20:54
Crettig
2,582722
DOCUMENTATION
All your main char has to do is bring a vial of ink with him/her and also a sheet of paper (hopefully a journal). Assuming your character has the literacy skill > 10, they should be able to read and write.
After your character has slain the trolls, have the character take out some ink and a sheet of paper. Spread the ink over the troll hand and ear. Attach the sheet of paper to the hand and then the ear. The ink marks from hand/ears should be unique to each troll. Now present your slaying documentation to your quest giver and bing bang boom LEVEL UP!
answered Nov 13 at 20:54
Crettig
2,582722
answered Nov 13 at 20:54
Crettig
2,582722
answered Nov 13 at 20:54
Crettig
2,582722
answered Nov 13 at 20:54
Crettig
2,582722
2,582722
4
I suspect it will be quite hard to tell the difference between imprints from two different trolls, and two imprints from the same troll in different positions.
– Brilliand
Nov 13 at 21:47
4
@Brilliand "All trolls look alike!1!" --- nah
– hiergiltdiestfu
Nov 14 at 8:15
3
This is what I was going to post. If they resemble humans so much, no finger/palm print would match between trolls. To be paid, your print must be verified at the Scotland Bard's National Bureau of Troll Identification. If you bring in a copy, you forfeit your troll hunting rights for life. If it's a legit hand print, you get your gold.
– ColonelPanic
Nov 14 at 10:41
1
Let's say you're to provide left hand/ear prints. Could you over-ink enough to take a right hand/ear print, then use a second sheet of paper to obtain a reverse copy of same? that would let you take out 8 trolls, but have evidence indicating you took out 16. Also - what if a troll is missing their left hand/ear?
– RDFozz
Nov 16 at 20:04
1
@RDFozz I trust the invisible medieval gauntlet of capitalism to find a solution to the counterfeiting problem (a guild of checkers to check for dupes as an example). I was under the impression ever since I was 11 and playing DND that Trolls always regenerate. If that isn't the case, I suppose people would just accept whatever details were available. Supposing they have NO ears or hands, the market probably would deem them as "not harmful" and therefor not worth the normal quest market price.
– Crettig
Nov 16 at 20:12
add a comment |
4
I suspect it will be quite hard to tell the difference between imprints from two different trolls, and two imprints from the same troll in different positions.
– Brilliand
Nov 13 at 21:47
4
@Brilliand "All trolls look alike!1!" --- nah
– hiergiltdiestfu
Nov 14 at 8:15
3
This is what I was going to post. If they resemble humans so much, no finger/palm print would match between trolls. To be paid, your print must be verified at the Scotland Bard's National Bureau of Troll Identification. If you bring in a copy, you forfeit your troll hunting rights for life. If it's a legit hand print, you get your gold.
– ColonelPanic
Nov 14 at 10:41
1
Let's say you're to provide left hand/ear prints. Could you over-ink enough to take a right hand/ear print, then use a second sheet of paper to obtain a reverse copy of same? that would let you take out 8 trolls, but have evidence indicating you took out 16. Also - what if a troll is missing their left hand/ear?
– RDFozz
Nov 16 at 20:04
1
@RDFozz I trust the invisible medieval gauntlet of capitalism to find a solution to the counterfeiting problem (a guild of checkers to check for dupes as an example). I was under the impression ever since I was 11 and playing DND that Trolls always regenerate. If that isn't the case, I suppose people would just accept whatever details were available. Supposing they have NO ears or hands, the market probably would deem them as "not harmful" and therefor not worth the normal quest market price.
– Crettig
Nov 16 at 20:12
4
4
I suspect it will be quite hard to tell the difference between imprints from two different trolls, and two imprints from the same troll in different positions.
– Brilliand
Nov 13 at 21:47
I suspect it will be quite hard to tell the difference between imprints from two different trolls, and two imprints from the same troll in different positions.
– Brilliand
Nov 13 at 21:47
4
4
@Brilliand "All trolls look alike!1!" --- nah
– hiergiltdiestfu
Nov 14 at 8:15
@Brilliand "All trolls look alike!1!" --- nah
– hiergiltdiestfu
Nov 14 at 8:15
3
3
This is what I was going to post. If they resemble humans so much, no finger/palm print would match between trolls. To be paid, your print must be verified at the Scotland Bard's National Bureau of Troll Identification. If you bring in a copy, you forfeit your troll hunting rights for life. If it's a legit hand print, you get your gold.
– ColonelPanic
Nov 14 at 10:41
This is what I was going to post. If they resemble humans so much, no finger/palm print would match between trolls. To be paid, your print must be verified at the Scotland Bard's National Bureau of Troll Identification. If you bring in a copy, you forfeit your troll hunting rights for life. If it's a legit hand print, you get your gold.
– ColonelPanic
Nov 14 at 10:41
1
1
Let's say you're to provide left hand/ear prints. Could you over-ink enough to take a right hand/ear print, then use a second sheet of paper to obtain a reverse copy of same? that would let you take out 8 trolls, but have evidence indicating you took out 16. Also - what if a troll is missing their left hand/ear?
– RDFozz
Nov 16 at 20:04
Let's say you're to provide left hand/ear prints. Could you over-ink enough to take a right hand/ear print, then use a second sheet of paper to obtain a reverse copy of same? that would let you take out 8 trolls, but have evidence indicating you took out 16. Also - what if a troll is missing their left hand/ear?
– RDFozz
Nov 16 at 20:04
1
1
@RDFozz I trust the invisible medieval gauntlet of capitalism to find a solution to the counterfeiting problem (a guild of checkers to check for dupes as an example). I was under the impression ever since I was 11 and playing DND that Trolls always regenerate. If that isn't the case, I suppose people would just accept whatever details were available. Supposing they have NO ears or hands, the market probably would deem them as "not harmful" and therefor not worth the normal quest market price.
– Crettig
Nov 16 at 20:12
@RDFozz I trust the invisible medieval gauntlet of capitalism to find a solution to the counterfeiting problem (a guild of checkers to check for dupes as an example). I was under the impression ever since I was 11 and playing DND that Trolls always regenerate. If that isn't the case, I suppose people would just accept whatever details were available. Supposing they have NO ears or hands, the market probably would deem them as "not harmful" and therefor not worth the normal quest market price.
– Crettig
Nov 16 at 20:12
add a comment |
up vote
15
down vote
Ear Wax
Troll Earwax is the best wax for clean burning candles. Your quest is not simply to go kill these trolls but to harvest their earwax. You are paid by the weight of wax brought back that way fair compensation goes for bigger trolls with more wax than the smaller trolls who just don't make enough yet.
answered Nov 13 at 22:01
Reed
2,132415
6
You don't know how badly this makes me want to post another answer for "Troll Semen" to support conservational efforts in lieu of the genocidal adventures.
– anon
Nov 14 at 2:57
2
@anon How are you going to collect semen from a dead troll?
– Nzall
Nov 15 at 13:31
1
@anon what sucks is the asymmetry of that "lacking the proper equipment and knowledge, I just grabbed these instead" holds up ovaries by the fallopian tubes leaving behind dead males with a goofy grin and females looking disembowelled.
– Alec Teal
yesterday
add a comment |
up vote
15
down vote
Ear Wax
Troll Earwax is the best wax for clean burning candles. Your quest is not simply to go kill these trolls but to harvest their earwax. You are paid by the weight of wax brought back that way fair compensation goes for bigger trolls with more wax than the smaller trolls who just don't make enough yet.
answered Nov 13 at 22:01
Reed
2,132415
6
You don't know how badly this makes me want to post another answer for "Troll Semen" to support conservational efforts in lieu of the genocidal adventures.
– anon
Nov 14 at 2:57
2
@anon How are you going to collect semen from a dead troll?
– Nzall
Nov 15 at 13:31
1
@anon what sucks is the asymmetry of that "lacking the proper equipment and knowledge, I just grabbed these instead" holds up ovaries by the fallopian tubes leaving behind dead males with a goofy grin and females looking disembowelled.
– Alec Teal
yesterday
add a comment |
up vote
15
down vote
up vote
15
down vote
Ear Wax
Troll Earwax is the best wax for clean burning candles. Your quest is not simply to go kill these trolls but to harvest their earwax. You are paid by the weight of wax brought back that way fair compensation goes for bigger trolls with more wax than the smaller trolls who just don't make enough yet.
answered Nov 13 at 22:01
Reed
2,132415
Ear Wax
Troll Earwax is the best wax for clean burning candles. Your quest is not simply to go kill these trolls but to harvest their earwax. You are paid by the weight of wax brought back that way fair compensation goes for bigger trolls with more wax than the smaller trolls who just don't make enough yet.
answered Nov 13 at 22:01
Reed
2,132415
answered Nov 13 at 22:01
Reed
2,132415
answered Nov 13 at 22:01
Reed
2,132415
answered Nov 13 at 22:01
Reed
2,132415
2,132415
6
You don't know how badly this makes me want to post another answer for "Troll Semen" to support conservational efforts in lieu of the genocidal adventures.
– anon
Nov 14 at 2:57
2
@anon How are you going to collect semen from a dead troll?
– Nzall
Nov 15 at 13:31
1
@anon what sucks is the asymmetry of that "lacking the proper equipment and knowledge, I just grabbed these instead" holds up ovaries by the fallopian tubes leaving behind dead males with a goofy grin and females looking disembowelled.
– Alec Teal
yesterday
add a comment |
6
You don't know how badly this makes me want to post another answer for "Troll Semen" to support conservational efforts in lieu of the genocidal adventures.
– anon
Nov 14 at 2:57
2
@anon How are you going to collect semen from a dead troll?
– Nzall
Nov 15 at 13:31
1
@anon what sucks is the asymmetry of that "lacking the proper equipment and knowledge, I just grabbed these instead" holds up ovaries by the fallopian tubes leaving behind dead males with a goofy grin and females looking disembowelled.
– Alec Teal
yesterday
6
6
You don't know how badly this makes me want to post another answer for "Troll Semen" to support conservational efforts in lieu of the genocidal adventures.
– anon
Nov 14 at 2:57
You don't know how badly this makes me want to post another answer for "Troll Semen" to support conservational efforts in lieu of the genocidal adventures.
– anon
Nov 14 at 2:57
2
2
@anon How are you going to collect semen from a dead troll?
– Nzall
Nov 15 at 13:31
@anon How are you going to collect semen from a dead troll?
– Nzall
Nov 15 at 13:31
1
1
@anon what sucks is the asymmetry of that "lacking the proper equipment and knowledge, I just grabbed these instead" holds up ovaries by the fallopian tubes leaving behind dead males with a goofy grin and females looking disembowelled.
– Alec Teal
yesterday
@anon what sucks is the asymmetry of that "lacking the proper equipment and knowledge, I just grabbed these instead" holds up ovaries by the fallopian tubes leaving behind dead males with a goofy grin and females looking disembowelled.
– Alec Teal
yesterday
add a comment |
up vote
15
down vote
Take along an agreed credible witness to document the activity.
Perhaps a priest or other literate person.
Does create the extra bother of protecting them.
answered Nov 14 at 4:57
Keith
83438
8
Protection is only a problem if you actually kill a troll, rather than agree to donate half the reward to the church.
– Dewi Morgan
Nov 14 at 21:53
add a comment |
up vote
15
down vote
Take along an agreed credible witness to document the activity.
Perhaps a priest or other literate person.
Does create the extra bother of protecting them.
answered Nov 14 at 4:57
Keith
83438
8
Protection is only a problem if you actually kill a troll, rather than agree to donate half the reward to the church.
– Dewi Morgan
Nov 14 at 21:53
add a comment |
up vote
15
down vote
up vote
15
down vote
Take along an agreed credible witness to document the activity.
Perhaps a priest or other literate person.
Does create the extra bother of protecting them.
answered Nov 14 at 4:57
Keith
83438
Take along an agreed credible witness to document the activity.
Perhaps a priest or other literate person.
Does create the extra bother of protecting them.
answered Nov 14 at 4:57
Keith
83438
answered Nov 14 at 4:57
Keith
83438
answered Nov 14 at 4:57
Keith
83438
answered Nov 14 at 4:57
Keith
83438
83438
8
Protection is only a problem if you actually kill a troll, rather than agree to donate half the reward to the church.
– Dewi Morgan
Nov 14 at 21:53
add a comment |
8
Protection is only a problem if you actually kill a troll, rather than agree to donate half the reward to the church.
– Dewi Morgan
Nov 14 at 21:53
8
8
Protection is only a problem if you actually kill a troll, rather than agree to donate half the reward to the church.
– Dewi Morgan
Nov 14 at 21:53
Protection is only a problem if you actually kill a troll, rather than agree to donate half the reward to the church.
– Dewi Morgan
Nov 14 at 21:53
add a comment |
up vote
10
down vote
Collect their foreskins.
David was tasked by Saul to collect a dowry of 100 Philistine deaths. David, one of life's over-achievers, returned with proof of their deaths in the form of 200 of the offending articles.
Therefore David arose and went, he and his men, and slew of the
Philistines two hundred men; and David brought their foreskins, and
they gave them in full number to the king, that he might be the king's
son-in-law. And Saul gave him Michal his daughter as his wife.
1 Samuel 18:27
Not only was it super-effective in proving their deaths (since no respecting Philistine would allow David's small army to mess with their junk if they could possibly help it) but it was both portable and relatively non-bloody because a dead body has practically no bloodflow.
If your men are genuinely squeamish about even a single drop of blood they can use the local equivalent of cautery by heating a razor-sharp knife over a flame until red hot. This will seal the blood vessels as they cut.
answered Nov 14 at 21:01
Richard
652417
Came here to give the same answer. Also, David couldn't just raze the first village on the way, as women have no foreskins. He also couldn't ask his own men for a donation to the wedding fund, because they already had their foreskins removed. So Philistines were the only available source. And by the way, doubling the required number was quite a feat, but I think it would have been even funnier, if he came back with those guys alive, well,, and converted to Judaism :)
– Darth Hunterix
Nov 16 at 7:55
2
@DarthHunterix - The was one of the plot points in Heller's parody "God Knows". David is initially under the impression that he has to circumcise the philistines live and budgets accordingly "Allowing about an hour, on average, to locate and seize each Philistine for circumcision, and working with four squads of six men taking their daylight nourishment on the prowl rather than breaking for lunch...". He's much happier to learn that he can simply kill them first.
– Richard
Nov 16 at 8:06
Good one :) However I meant an actual conversion, turning them from enemies into friends. In any case, all three options are badass enough on their own.
– Darth Hunterix
Nov 16 at 8:44
What if trolls (a) are born without foreskins (b) are circumcised to prevent the shame of having their foreskin stolen if they are killed. Maybe this was the origin of circumcision. Maybe warring tribes used to use this as evidence of kills.
– chasly from UK
Nov 16 at 11:36
@chaslyfromUK - you can really cut of any non-fleshy part like an ear as long as you wait for the blood to congeal a little
– Richard
Nov 16 at 15:11
add a comment |
up vote
10
down vote
Collect their foreskins.
David was tasked by Saul to collect a dowry of 100 Philistine deaths. David, one of life's over-achievers, returned with proof of their deaths in the form of 200 of the offending articles.
Therefore David arose and went, he and his men, and slew of the
Philistines two hundred men; and David brought their foreskins, and
they gave them in full number to the king, that he might be the king's
son-in-law. And Saul gave him Michal his daughter as his wife.
1 Samuel 18:27
Not only was it super-effective in proving their deaths (since no respecting Philistine would allow David's small army to mess with their junk if they could possibly help it) but it was both portable and relatively non-bloody because a dead body has practically no bloodflow.
If your men are genuinely squeamish about even a single drop of blood they can use the local equivalent of cautery by heating a razor-sharp knife over a flame until red hot. This will seal the blood vessels as they cut.
answered Nov 14 at 21:01
Richard
652417
Came here to give the same answer. Also, David couldn't just raze the first village on the way, as women have no foreskins. He also couldn't ask his own men for a donation to the wedding fund, because they already had their foreskins removed. So Philistines were the only available source. And by the way, doubling the required number was quite a feat, but I think it would have been even funnier, if he came back with those guys alive, well,, and converted to Judaism :)
– Darth Hunterix
Nov 16 at 7:55
2
@DarthHunterix - The was one of the plot points in Heller's parody "God Knows". David is initially under the impression that he has to circumcise the philistines live and budgets accordingly "Allowing about an hour, on average, to locate and seize each Philistine for circumcision, and working with four squads of six men taking their daylight nourishment on the prowl rather than breaking for lunch...". He's much happier to learn that he can simply kill them first.
– Richard
Nov 16 at 8:06
Good one :) However I meant an actual conversion, turning them from enemies into friends. In any case, all three options are badass enough on their own.
– Darth Hunterix
Nov 16 at 8:44
What if trolls (a) are born without foreskins (b) are circumcised to prevent the shame of having their foreskin stolen if they are killed. Maybe this was the origin of circumcision. Maybe warring tribes used to use this as evidence of kills.
– chasly from UK
Nov 16 at 11:36
@chaslyfromUK - you can really cut of any non-fleshy part like an ear as long as you wait for the blood to congeal a little
– Richard
Nov 16 at 15:11
add a comment |
up vote
10
down vote
up vote
10
down vote
Collect their foreskins.
David was tasked by Saul to collect a dowry of 100 Philistine deaths. David, one of life's over-achievers, returned with proof of their deaths in the form of 200 of the offending articles.
Therefore David arose and went, he and his men, and slew of the
Philistines two hundred men; and David brought their foreskins, and
they gave them in full number to the king, that he might be the king's
son-in-law. And Saul gave him Michal his daughter as his wife.
1 Samuel 18:27
Not only was it super-effective in proving their deaths (since no respecting Philistine would allow David's small army to mess with their junk if they could possibly help it) but it was both portable and relatively non-bloody because a dead body has practically no bloodflow.
If your men are genuinely squeamish about even a single drop of blood they can use the local equivalent of cautery by heating a razor-sharp knife over a flame until red hot. This will seal the blood vessels as they cut.
answered Nov 14 at 21:01
Richard
652417
Collect their foreskins.
David was tasked by Saul to collect a dowry of 100 Philistine deaths. David, one of life's over-achievers, returned with proof of their deaths in the form of 200 of the offending articles.
Therefore David arose and went, he and his men, and slew of the
Philistines two hundred men; and David brought their foreskins, and
they gave them in full number to the king, that he might be the king's
son-in-law. And Saul gave him Michal his daughter as his wife.
1 Samuel 18:27
Not only was it super-effective in proving their deaths (since no respecting Philistine would allow David's small army to mess with their junk if they could possibly help it) but it was both portable and relatively non-bloody because a dead body has practically no bloodflow.
If your men are genuinely squeamish about even a single drop of blood they can use the local equivalent of cautery by heating a razor-sharp knife over a flame until red hot. This will seal the blood vessels as they cut.
answered Nov 14 at 21:01
Richard
652417
answered Nov 14 at 21:01
Richard
652417
answered Nov 14 at 21:01
Richard
652417
answered Nov 14 at 21:01
Richard
652417
652417
Came here to give the same answer. Also, David couldn't just raze the first village on the way, as women have no foreskins. He also couldn't ask his own men for a donation to the wedding fund, because they already had their foreskins removed. So Philistines were the only available source. And by the way, doubling the required number was quite a feat, but I think it would have been even funnier, if he came back with those guys alive, well,, and converted to Judaism :)
– Darth Hunterix
Nov 16 at 7:55
2
@DarthHunterix - The was one of the plot points in Heller's parody "God Knows". David is initially under the impression that he has to circumcise the philistines live and budgets accordingly "Allowing about an hour, on average, to locate and seize each Philistine for circumcision, and working with four squads of six men taking their daylight nourishment on the prowl rather than breaking for lunch...". He's much happier to learn that he can simply kill them first.
– Richard
Nov 16 at 8:06
Good one :) However I meant an actual conversion, turning them from enemies into friends. In any case, all three options are badass enough on their own.
– Darth Hunterix
Nov 16 at 8:44
What if trolls (a) are born without foreskins (b) are circumcised to prevent the shame of having their foreskin stolen if they are killed. Maybe this was the origin of circumcision. Maybe warring tribes used to use this as evidence of kills.
– chasly from UK
Nov 16 at 11:36
@chaslyfromUK - you can really cut of any non-fleshy part like an ear as long as you wait for the blood to congeal a little
– Richard
Nov 16 at 15:11
add a comment |
Came here to give the same answer. Also, David couldn't just raze the first village on the way, as women have no foreskins. He also couldn't ask his own men for a donation to the wedding fund, because they already had their foreskins removed. So Philistines were the only available source. And by the way, doubling the required number was quite a feat, but I think it would have been even funnier, if he came back with those guys alive, well,, and converted to Judaism :)
– Darth Hunterix
Nov 16 at 7:55
2
@DarthHunterix - The was one of the plot points in Heller's parody "God Knows". David is initially under the impression that he has to circumcise the philistines live and budgets accordingly "Allowing about an hour, on average, to locate and seize each Philistine for circumcision, and working with four squads of six men taking their daylight nourishment on the prowl rather than breaking for lunch...". He's much happier to learn that he can simply kill them first.
– Richard
Nov 16 at 8:06
Good one :) However I meant an actual conversion, turning them from enemies into friends. In any case, all three options are badass enough on their own.
– Darth Hunterix
Nov 16 at 8:44
What if trolls (a) are born without foreskins (b) are circumcised to prevent the shame of having their foreskin stolen if they are killed. Maybe this was the origin of circumcision. Maybe warring tribes used to use this as evidence of kills.
– chasly from UK
Nov 16 at 11:36
@chaslyfromUK - you can really cut of any non-fleshy part like an ear as long as you wait for the blood to congeal a little
– Richard
Nov 16 at 15:11
Came here to give the same answer. Also, David couldn't just raze the first village on the way, as women have no foreskins. He also couldn't ask his own men for a donation to the wedding fund, because they already had their foreskins removed. So Philistines were the only available source. And by the way, doubling the required number was quite a feat, but I think it would have been even funnier, if he came back with those guys alive, well,, and converted to Judaism :)
– Darth Hunterix
Nov 16 at 7:55
Came here to give the same answer. Also, David couldn't just raze the first village on the way, as women have no foreskins. He also couldn't ask his own men for a donation to the wedding fund, because they already had their foreskins removed. So Philistines were the only available source. And by the way, doubling the required number was quite a feat, but I think it would have been even funnier, if he came back with those guys alive, well,, and converted to Judaism :)
– Darth Hunterix
Nov 16 at 7:55
2
2
@DarthHunterix - The was one of the plot points in Heller's parody "God Knows". David is initially under the impression that he has to circumcise the philistines live and budgets accordingly "Allowing about an hour, on average, to locate and seize each Philistine for circumcision, and working with four squads of six men taking their daylight nourishment on the prowl rather than breaking for lunch...". He's much happier to learn that he can simply kill them first.
– Richard
Nov 16 at 8:06
@DarthHunterix - The was one of the plot points in Heller's parody "God Knows". David is initially under the impression that he has to circumcise the philistines live and budgets accordingly "Allowing about an hour, on average, to locate and seize each Philistine for circumcision, and working with four squads of six men taking their daylight nourishment on the prowl rather than breaking for lunch...". He's much happier to learn that he can simply kill them first.
– Richard
Nov 16 at 8:06
Good one :) However I meant an actual conversion, turning them from enemies into friends. In any case, all three options are badass enough on their own.
– Darth Hunterix
Nov 16 at 8:44
Good one :) However I meant an actual conversion, turning them from enemies into friends. In any case, all three options are badass enough on their own.
– Darth Hunterix
Nov 16 at 8:44
What if trolls (a) are born without foreskins (b) are circumcised to prevent the shame of having their foreskin stolen if they are killed. Maybe this was the origin of circumcision. Maybe warring tribes used to use this as evidence of kills.
– chasly from UK
Nov 16 at 11:36
What if trolls (a) are born without foreskins (b) are circumcised to prevent the shame of having their foreskin stolen if they are killed. Maybe this was the origin of circumcision. Maybe warring tribes used to use this as evidence of kills.
– chasly from UK
Nov 16 at 11:36
@chaslyfromUK - you can really cut of any non-fleshy part like an ear as long as you wait for the blood to congeal a little
– Richard
Nov 16 at 15:11
@chaslyfromUK - you can really cut of any non-fleshy part like an ear as long as you wait for the blood to congeal a little
– Richard
Nov 16 at 15:11
add a comment |
up vote
10
down vote
Burn the Body, then bring back the skull.
answered Nov 15 at 22:11
Stephan
1,362212
Short, sweet and to the point!
– elemtilas
Nov 15 at 22:47
This actually does work, a bit time consuming but it works.
– anon
2 days ago
You can burn a dead troll's body that you didnt even kill, bring the skull back, and say "hey I killed this with just my thumb!"
– Mr.J
23 hours ago
add a comment |
up vote
10
down vote
Burn the Body, then bring back the skull.
answered Nov 15 at 22:11
Stephan
1,362212
Short, sweet and to the point!
– elemtilas
Nov 15 at 22:47
This actually does work, a bit time consuming but it works.
– anon
2 days ago
You can burn a dead troll's body that you didnt even kill, bring the skull back, and say "hey I killed this with just my thumb!"
– Mr.J
23 hours ago
add a comment |
up vote
10
down vote
up vote
10
down vote
Burn the Body, then bring back the skull.
answered Nov 15 at 22:11
Stephan
1,362212
Burn the Body, then bring back the skull.
answered Nov 15 at 22:11
Stephan
1,362212
answered Nov 15 at 22:11
Stephan
1,362212
answered Nov 15 at 22:11
Stephan
1,362212
answered Nov 15 at 22:11
Stephan
1,362212
1,362212
Short, sweet and to the point!
– elemtilas
Nov 15 at 22:47
This actually does work, a bit time consuming but it works.
– anon
2 days ago
You can burn a dead troll's body that you didnt even kill, bring the skull back, and say "hey I killed this with just my thumb!"
– Mr.J
23 hours ago
add a comment |
Short, sweet and to the point!
– elemtilas
Nov 15 at 22:47
This actually does work, a bit time consuming but it works.
– anon
2 days ago
You can burn a dead troll's body that you didnt even kill, bring the skull back, and say "hey I killed this with just my thumb!"
– Mr.J
23 hours ago
Short, sweet and to the point!
– elemtilas
Nov 15 at 22:47
Short, sweet and to the point!
– elemtilas
Nov 15 at 22:47
This actually does work, a bit time consuming but it works.
– anon
2 days ago
This actually does work, a bit time consuming but it works.
– anon
2 days ago
You can burn a dead troll's body that you didnt even kill, bring the skull back, and say "hey I killed this with just my thumb!"
– Mr.J
23 hours ago
You can burn a dead troll's body that you didnt even kill, bring the skull back, and say "hey I killed this with just my thumb!"
– Mr.J
23 hours ago
add a comment |
up vote
9
down vote
The squeamish adventurers kill the troll via boredom.
No blood, no guts, nothing.
The adventure pays (on account of being squeamish) individuals without a sense of smell to carry/drag/transport the full troll body back in an ice bag.
- The guild must acknowledge that it is indeed a dead troll, no questions asked.
- The adventurer is renowned for their ability to slay otherwise quite difficult to kill trolls without actually laying a hand on them.
- The DM buys shares in the ice business because it's going to be big.
edited Nov 14 at 18:50
nzaman
8,73611443
answered Nov 14 at 3:28
Kain0_0
4623
add a comment |
up vote
9
down vote
The squeamish adventurers kill the troll via boredom.
No blood, no guts, nothing.
The adventure pays (on account of being squeamish) individuals without a sense of smell to carry/drag/transport the full troll body back in an ice bag.
- The guild must acknowledge that it is indeed a dead troll, no questions asked.
- The adventurer is renowned for their ability to slay otherwise quite difficult to kill trolls without actually laying a hand on them.
- The DM buys shares in the ice business because it's going to be big.
edited Nov 14 at 18:50
nzaman
8,73611443
answered Nov 14 at 3:28
Kain0_0
4623
add a comment |
up vote
9
down vote
up vote
9
down vote
The squeamish adventurers kill the troll via boredom.
No blood, no guts, nothing.
The adventure pays (on account of being squeamish) individuals without a sense of smell to carry/drag/transport the full troll body back in an ice bag.
- The guild must acknowledge that it is indeed a dead troll, no questions asked.
- The adventurer is renowned for their ability to slay otherwise quite difficult to kill trolls without actually laying a hand on them.
- The DM buys shares in the ice business because it's going to be big.
edited Nov 14 at 18:50
nzaman
8,73611443
answered Nov 14 at 3:28
Kain0_0
4623
The squeamish adventurers kill the troll via boredom.
No blood, no guts, nothing.
The adventure pays (on account of being squeamish) individuals without a sense of smell to carry/drag/transport the full troll body back in an ice bag.
- The guild must acknowledge that it is indeed a dead troll, no questions asked.
- The adventurer is renowned for their ability to slay otherwise quite difficult to kill trolls without actually laying a hand on them.
- The DM buys shares in the ice business because it's going to be big.
edited Nov 14 at 18:50
nzaman
8,73611443
answered Nov 14 at 3:28
Kain0_0
4623
edited Nov 14 at 18:50
nzaman
8,73611443
edited Nov 14 at 18:50
nzaman
8,73611443
edited Nov 14 at 18:50
nzaman
8,73611443
8,73611443
answered Nov 14 at 3:28
Kain0_0
4623
answered Nov 14 at 3:28
Kain0_0
4623
answered Nov 14 at 3:28
Kain0_0
4623
4623
add a comment |
add a comment |
up vote
7
down vote
Make a travois! They're certainly simpler to make than anything with wheels
Regardless of your power level, dragging is easier than carrying. Travois don't require wheels, though it's certainly an option to reduce your expended effort. Make it longer, or tie a rope to it if you're still getting nauseous. Regardless, it's a simple enough device that you can hook it up to a horse or an unenthusiastic hireling
That being said, a cart or wagon will serve you better, but that's less outside-the-box
answered Nov 13 at 19:23
Punintended
4536
add a comment |
up vote
7
down vote
Make a travois! They're certainly simpler to make than anything with wheels
Regardless of your power level, dragging is easier than carrying. Travois don't require wheels, though it's certainly an option to reduce your expended effort. Make it longer, or tie a rope to it if you're still getting nauseous. Regardless, it's a simple enough device that you can hook it up to a horse or an unenthusiastic hireling
That being said, a cart or wagon will serve you better, but that's less outside-the-box
answered Nov 13 at 19:23
Punintended
4536
add a comment |
up vote
7
down vote
up vote
7
down vote
Make a travois! They're certainly simpler to make than anything with wheels
Regardless of your power level, dragging is easier than carrying. Travois don't require wheels, though it's certainly an option to reduce your expended effort. Make it longer, or tie a rope to it if you're still getting nauseous. Regardless, it's a simple enough device that you can hook it up to a horse or an unenthusiastic hireling
That being said, a cart or wagon will serve you better, but that's less outside-the-box
answered Nov 13 at 19:23
Punintended
4536
Make a travois! They're certainly simpler to make than anything with wheels
Regardless of your power level, dragging is easier than carrying. Travois don't require wheels, though it's certainly an option to reduce your expended effort. Make it longer, or tie a rope to it if you're still getting nauseous. Regardless, it's a simple enough device that you can hook it up to a horse or an unenthusiastic hireling
That being said, a cart or wagon will serve you better, but that's less outside-the-box
answered Nov 13 at 19:23
Punintended
4536
answered Nov 13 at 19:23
Punintended
4536
answered Nov 13 at 19:23
Punintended
4536
answered Nov 13 at 19:23
Punintended
4536
4536
add a comment |
add a comment |
up vote
7
down vote
You see hiring a guy to kill 15 troll and not telling them how he should prove those 15 kills would be the stupidest idea ever. Why?
Because person who take a quest to kill 15 troll IS the person who will drag (or will hire other people to drag) 15 rotting, smelly, troll carcasses to your doors to prove that they, in fact, killed them. And to prove that those are their kill, and not some roadkills they find lying around, they will either catch souls of those trolls to testify before you who slayed them or will have you watch their death with some magic.
Great deal, now you have 15 rotting meatbags, 15 screaming souls or you watched so many troll death you have it imprinted in your eyeballs and one person who you need to pay because you see they are nothing to flick around.
You know what is better? That don't have blood? That don't require you to watch? And will have higher crop with the same bounty? Troll Jewellery. Let's say that troll wears rings. They have finite amount of fingers so you assume that every troll can wear 10 of them. So you say "hey, bring me 150 troll rings".
The catch is that not every troll wear 10 rings. Some wear 3, some wear none. The result is that to get 150 rings adventurers need to kill much more. Yet the guild pay like they would kill 15 of them.
EXTRA CATCH FOR MAXIMUM EXTRA MEGA PROFIT The guild, and trolls, are the only ones who can melt those ring into "non-troll, not at all, all genuine dwarf" jewellery. So you make those rings worthless outside guild quest while fetching extra money. Basically the quest pay for itself while making extra income for the guild.
And this is the story of how make money in fantasy world using cheap labour and monopolizing market.
answered Nov 14 at 14:30
SZCZERZO KŁY
15.3k22346
in my original question this was an RPG quest situation where the protagonist didn't read the quest instructions. But it got edited to fit the worldbuilding format.
– Eries
Nov 14 at 14:34
2
@Eries for that reason quest instructions would have "I have read and agreed" at the bottom and if protagonist did something else then he would not get paid. Also very RPG guild move to kill troll and not pay adventurers who don't read.
– SZCZERZO KŁY
Nov 14 at 14:37
add a comment |
up vote
7
down vote
You see hiring a guy to kill 15 troll and not telling them how he should prove those 15 kills would be the stupidest idea ever. Why?
Because person who take a quest to kill 15 troll IS the person who will drag (or will hire other people to drag) 15 rotting, smelly, troll carcasses to your doors to prove that they, in fact, killed them. And to prove that those are their kill, and not some roadkills they find lying around, they will either catch souls of those trolls to testify before you who slayed them or will have you watch their death with some magic.
Great deal, now you have 15 rotting meatbags, 15 screaming souls or you watched so many troll death you have it imprinted in your eyeballs and one person who you need to pay because you see they are nothing to flick around.
You know what is better? That don't have blood? That don't require you to watch? And will have higher crop with the same bounty? Troll Jewellery. Let's say that troll wears rings. They have finite amount of fingers so you assume that every troll can wear 10 of them. So you say "hey, bring me 150 troll rings".
The catch is that not every troll wear 10 rings. Some wear 3, some wear none. The result is that to get 150 rings adventurers need to kill much more. Yet the guild pay like they would kill 15 of them.
EXTRA CATCH FOR MAXIMUM EXTRA MEGA PROFIT The guild, and trolls, are the only ones who can melt those ring into "non-troll, not at all, all genuine dwarf" jewellery. So you make those rings worthless outside guild quest while fetching extra money. Basically the quest pay for itself while making extra income for the guild.
And this is the story of how make money in fantasy world using cheap labour and monopolizing market.
answered Nov 14 at 14:30
SZCZERZO KŁY
15.3k22346
in my original question this was an RPG quest situation where the protagonist didn't read the quest instructions. But it got edited to fit the worldbuilding format.
– Eries
Nov 14 at 14:34
2
@Eries for that reason quest instructions would have "I have read and agreed" at the bottom and if protagonist did something else then he would not get paid. Also very RPG guild move to kill troll and not pay adventurers who don't read.
– SZCZERZO KŁY
Nov 14 at 14:37
add a comment |
up vote
7
down vote
up vote
7
down vote
You see hiring a guy to kill 15 troll and not telling them how he should prove those 15 kills would be the stupidest idea ever. Why?
Because person who take a quest to kill 15 troll IS the person who will drag (or will hire other people to drag) 15 rotting, smelly, troll carcasses to your doors to prove that they, in fact, killed them. And to prove that those are their kill, and not some roadkills they find lying around, they will either catch souls of those trolls to testify before you who slayed them or will have you watch their death with some magic.
Great deal, now you have 15 rotting meatbags, 15 screaming souls or you watched so many troll death you have it imprinted in your eyeballs and one person who you need to pay because you see they are nothing to flick around.
You know what is better? That don't have blood? That don't require you to watch? And will have higher crop with the same bounty? Troll Jewellery. Let's say that troll wears rings. They have finite amount of fingers so you assume that every troll can wear 10 of them. So you say "hey, bring me 150 troll rings".
The catch is that not every troll wear 10 rings. Some wear 3, some wear none. The result is that to get 150 rings adventurers need to kill much more. Yet the guild pay like they would kill 15 of them.
EXTRA CATCH FOR MAXIMUM EXTRA MEGA PROFIT The guild, and trolls, are the only ones who can melt those ring into "non-troll, not at all, all genuine dwarf" jewellery. So you make those rings worthless outside guild quest while fetching extra money. Basically the quest pay for itself while making extra income for the guild.
And this is the story of how make money in fantasy world using cheap labour and monopolizing market.
answered Nov 14 at 14:30
SZCZERZO KŁY
15.3k22346
You see hiring a guy to kill 15 troll and not telling them how he should prove those 15 kills would be the stupidest idea ever. Why?
Because person who take a quest to kill 15 troll IS the person who will drag (or will hire other people to drag) 15 rotting, smelly, troll carcasses to your doors to prove that they, in fact, killed them. And to prove that those are their kill, and not some roadkills they find lying around, they will either catch souls of those trolls to testify before you who slayed them or will have you watch their death with some magic.
Great deal, now you have 15 rotting meatbags, 15 screaming souls or you watched so many troll death you have it imprinted in your eyeballs and one person who you need to pay because you see they are nothing to flick around.
You know what is better? That don't have blood? That don't require you to watch? And will have higher crop with the same bounty? Troll Jewellery. Let's say that troll wears rings. They have finite amount of fingers so you assume that every troll can wear 10 of them. So you say "hey, bring me 150 troll rings".
The catch is that not every troll wear 10 rings. Some wear 3, some wear none. The result is that to get 150 rings adventurers need to kill much more. Yet the guild pay like they would kill 15 of them.
EXTRA CATCH FOR MAXIMUM EXTRA MEGA PROFIT The guild, and trolls, are the only ones who can melt those ring into "non-troll, not at all, all genuine dwarf" jewellery. So you make those rings worthless outside guild quest while fetching extra money. Basically the quest pay for itself while making extra income for the guild.
And this is the story of how make money in fantasy world using cheap labour and monopolizing market.
answered Nov 14 at 14:30
SZCZERZO KŁY
15.3k22346
answered Nov 14 at 14:30
SZCZERZO KŁY
15.3k22346
answered Nov 14 at 14:30
SZCZERZO KŁY
15.3k22346
answered Nov 14 at 14:30
SZCZERZO KŁY
15.3k22346
15.3k22346
in my original question this was an RPG quest situation where the protagonist didn't read the quest instructions. But it got edited to fit the worldbuilding format.
– Eries
Nov 14 at 14:34
2
@Eries for that reason quest instructions would have "I have read and agreed" at the bottom and if protagonist did something else then he would not get paid. Also very RPG guild move to kill troll and not pay adventurers who don't read.
– SZCZERZO KŁY
Nov 14 at 14:37
add a comment |
in my original question this was an RPG quest situation where the protagonist didn't read the quest instructions. But it got edited to fit the worldbuilding format.
– Eries
Nov 14 at 14:34
2
@Eries for that reason quest instructions would have "I have read and agreed" at the bottom and if protagonist did something else then he would not get paid. Also very RPG guild move to kill troll and not pay adventurers who don't read.
– SZCZERZO KŁY
Nov 14 at 14:37
in my original question this was an RPG quest situation where the protagonist didn't read the quest instructions. But it got edited to fit the worldbuilding format.
– Eries
Nov 14 at 14:34
in my original question this was an RPG quest situation where the protagonist didn't read the quest instructions. But it got edited to fit the worldbuilding format.
– Eries
Nov 14 at 14:34
2
2
@Eries for that reason quest instructions would have "I have read and agreed" at the bottom and if protagonist did something else then he would not get paid. Also very RPG guild move to kill troll and not pay adventurers who don't read.
– SZCZERZO KŁY
Nov 14 at 14:37
@Eries for that reason quest instructions would have "I have read and agreed" at the bottom and if protagonist did something else then he would not get paid. Also very RPG guild move to kill troll and not pay adventurers who don't read.
– SZCZERZO KŁY
Nov 14 at 14:37
add a comment |
up vote
7
down vote
If you're really going with World of Warcraft (or D&D) style trolls, you've got a problem: They regenerate:
Although enough physical damage will kill them, trolls can regenerate lost limbs and heal grievous physical injuries at an accelerated rate, giving them a large advantage in battle.
So your proof is going to have to be something that doesn't regenerate. If you choose ears, or tusks, or fingers, or hands, or feet, your adventurers don't need to kill 15 trolls, they can capture just one, then harvest it for the relevant body part over and over (in both D&D and WoW, troll regeneration from nearly dead to unharmed occurs in the space of a few minutes at most, so you could harvest 15 trolls worth of body parts in the space of an hour, give or take).
So you need something that won't regenerate and can be uniquely associated with a single troll.
Unfortunately, the obvious solution here (in terms of maximum proof for minimum "amount of troll") is scalps; sure, the scalp itself can regenerate, but the hair is dead, and presumably grows at a relatively normal rate; you could harvest scalps over and over, but scalp #2 and onwards wouldn't have hair. The reason I say "unfortunately" is that nothing bleeds like a scalp wound and your adventurers are squeamish. As others have suggested, once the troll is dead, you could just wait a bit and the blood should coagulate, but if they don't want to deal with blood at all, they're stuck. Claws might also work (though in most depictions of trolls, a chopped off arm grows back with claws, so they may not be made of dead material the way human fingernails are).
The best I can come up with is having them collect the hair itself. It's not perfect; trolls have wildly varying amounts of, and growth patterns for, hair in most depictions, so it might be possible to take hair from one troll and pretend it came from two or more. But it's the best you're likely to come up with shy of dragging all 15 corpses back with you.
Ear wax, as mentioned in another answer, might also be viable (presumably carving out an ear and having it regrow won't have it regrow complete with ear wax build up), though as that answer notes, it can't give an accurate kill count, just a rough estimate (it's like hair, but even easier to subdivide).
There is a flaw with all of these methods: If trolls are smart, they might try to game your troll death metrics by regular grooming; shaving their heads, carving out the inner skin of their own ears (or use q-tips, whatever) every week or so, etc. If you're adventurers looking to make a buck, taking the risk of death fighting trolls that you won't be paid for might seem like a bad deal.
answered Nov 15 at 20:06
ShadowRanger
46927
add a comment |
up vote
7
down vote
If you're really going with World of Warcraft (or D&D) style trolls, you've got a problem: They regenerate:
Although enough physical damage will kill them, trolls can regenerate lost limbs and heal grievous physical injuries at an accelerated rate, giving them a large advantage in battle.
So your proof is going to have to be something that doesn't regenerate. If you choose ears, or tusks, or fingers, or hands, or feet, your adventurers don't need to kill 15 trolls, they can capture just one, then harvest it for the relevant body part over and over (in both D&D and WoW, troll regeneration from nearly dead to unharmed occurs in the space of a few minutes at most, so you could harvest 15 trolls worth of body parts in the space of an hour, give or take).
So you need something that won't regenerate and can be uniquely associated with a single troll.
Unfortunately, the obvious solution here (in terms of maximum proof for minimum "amount of troll") is scalps; sure, the scalp itself can regenerate, but the hair is dead, and presumably grows at a relatively normal rate; you could harvest scalps over and over, but scalp #2 and onwards wouldn't have hair. The reason I say "unfortunately" is that nothing bleeds like a scalp wound and your adventurers are squeamish. As others have suggested, once the troll is dead, you could just wait a bit and the blood should coagulate, but if they don't want to deal with blood at all, they're stuck. Claws might also work (though in most depictions of trolls, a chopped off arm grows back with claws, so they may not be made of dead material the way human fingernails are).
The best I can come up with is having them collect the hair itself. It's not perfect; trolls have wildly varying amounts of, and growth patterns for, hair in most depictions, so it might be possible to take hair from one troll and pretend it came from two or more. But it's the best you're likely to come up with shy of dragging all 15 corpses back with you.
Ear wax, as mentioned in another answer, might also be viable (presumably carving out an ear and having it regrow won't have it regrow complete with ear wax build up), though as that answer notes, it can't give an accurate kill count, just a rough estimate (it's like hair, but even easier to subdivide).
There is a flaw with all of these methods: If trolls are smart, they might try to game your troll death metrics by regular grooming; shaving their heads, carving out the inner skin of their own ears (or use q-tips, whatever) every week or so, etc. If you're adventurers looking to make a buck, taking the risk of death fighting trolls that you won't be paid for might seem like a bad deal.
answered Nov 15 at 20:06
ShadowRanger
46927
add a comment |
up vote
7
down vote
up vote
7
down vote
If you're really going with World of Warcraft (or D&D) style trolls, you've got a problem: They regenerate:
Although enough physical damage will kill them, trolls can regenerate lost limbs and heal grievous physical injuries at an accelerated rate, giving them a large advantage in battle.
So your proof is going to have to be something that doesn't regenerate. If you choose ears, or tusks, or fingers, or hands, or feet, your adventurers don't need to kill 15 trolls, they can capture just one, then harvest it for the relevant body part over and over (in both D&D and WoW, troll regeneration from nearly dead to unharmed occurs in the space of a few minutes at most, so you could harvest 15 trolls worth of body parts in the space of an hour, give or take).
So you need something that won't regenerate and can be uniquely associated with a single troll.
Unfortunately, the obvious solution here (in terms of maximum proof for minimum "amount of troll") is scalps; sure, the scalp itself can regenerate, but the hair is dead, and presumably grows at a relatively normal rate; you could harvest scalps over and over, but scalp #2 and onwards wouldn't have hair. The reason I say "unfortunately" is that nothing bleeds like a scalp wound and your adventurers are squeamish. As others have suggested, once the troll is dead, you could just wait a bit and the blood should coagulate, but if they don't want to deal with blood at all, they're stuck. Claws might also work (though in most depictions of trolls, a chopped off arm grows back with claws, so they may not be made of dead material the way human fingernails are).
The best I can come up with is having them collect the hair itself. It's not perfect; trolls have wildly varying amounts of, and growth patterns for, hair in most depictions, so it might be possible to take hair from one troll and pretend it came from two or more. But it's the best you're likely to come up with shy of dragging all 15 corpses back with you.
Ear wax, as mentioned in another answer, might also be viable (presumably carving out an ear and having it regrow won't have it regrow complete with ear wax build up), though as that answer notes, it can't give an accurate kill count, just a rough estimate (it's like hair, but even easier to subdivide).
There is a flaw with all of these methods: If trolls are smart, they might try to game your troll death metrics by regular grooming; shaving their heads, carving out the inner skin of their own ears (or use q-tips, whatever) every week or so, etc. If you're adventurers looking to make a buck, taking the risk of death fighting trolls that you won't be paid for might seem like a bad deal.
answered Nov 15 at 20:06
ShadowRanger
46927
If you're really going with World of Warcraft (or D&D) style trolls, you've got a problem: They regenerate:
Although enough physical damage will kill them, trolls can regenerate lost limbs and heal grievous physical injuries at an accelerated rate, giving them a large advantage in battle.
So your proof is going to have to be something that doesn't regenerate. If you choose ears, or tusks, or fingers, or hands, or feet, your adventurers don't need to kill 15 trolls, they can capture just one, then harvest it for the relevant body part over and over (in both D&D and WoW, troll regeneration from nearly dead to unharmed occurs in the space of a few minutes at most, so you could harvest 15 trolls worth of body parts in the space of an hour, give or take).
So you need something that won't regenerate and can be uniquely associated with a single troll.
Unfortunately, the obvious solution here (in terms of maximum proof for minimum "amount of troll") is scalps; sure, the scalp itself can regenerate, but the hair is dead, and presumably grows at a relatively normal rate; you could harvest scalps over and over, but scalp #2 and onwards wouldn't have hair. The reason I say "unfortunately" is that nothing bleeds like a scalp wound and your adventurers are squeamish. As others have suggested, once the troll is dead, you could just wait a bit and the blood should coagulate, but if they don't want to deal with blood at all, they're stuck. Claws might also work (though in most depictions of trolls, a chopped off arm grows back with claws, so they may not be made of dead material the way human fingernails are).
The best I can come up with is having them collect the hair itself. It's not perfect; trolls have wildly varying amounts of, and growth patterns for, hair in most depictions, so it might be possible to take hair from one troll and pretend it came from two or more. But it's the best you're likely to come up with shy of dragging all 15 corpses back with you.
Ear wax, as mentioned in another answer, might also be viable (presumably carving out an ear and having it regrow won't have it regrow complete with ear wax build up), though as that answer notes, it can't give an accurate kill count, just a rough estimate (it's like hair, but even easier to subdivide).
There is a flaw with all of these methods: If trolls are smart, they might try to game your troll death metrics by regular grooming; shaving their heads, carving out the inner skin of their own ears (or use q-tips, whatever) every week or so, etc. If you're adventurers looking to make a buck, taking the risk of death fighting trolls that you won't be paid for might seem like a bad deal.
answered Nov 15 at 20:06
ShadowRanger
46927
answered Nov 15 at 20:06
ShadowRanger
46927
answered Nov 15 at 20:06
ShadowRanger
46927
answered Nov 15 at 20:06
ShadowRanger
46927
46927
add a comment |
add a comment |
up vote
6
down vote
Bring full body vids including yourself knifing thru the heart & slitting throat of the orc, pre or post-mortem, along with an accompanying dna swab. He checks.
That should do the trick.
answered Nov 13 at 18:40
theRiley
1,41514
Those squeamish adventures don't want to cut bits off, but are fine to have a photo shoot slicing and dicing?
– Kain0_0
Nov 14 at 7:57
they wanted proof, they have proof. :) or just the dna, if the videoz are too unpleasant. but between the two, that proof is indisputable.
– theRiley
Nov 14 at 8:05
Good point, and any squeamish adventurer who adventures can certainly find an already dead troll.
– Kain0_0
Nov 14 at 8:27
add a comment |
up vote
6
down vote
Bring full body vids including yourself knifing thru the heart & slitting throat of the orc, pre or post-mortem, along with an accompanying dna swab. He checks.
That should do the trick.
answered Nov 13 at 18:40
theRiley
1,41514
Those squeamish adventures don't want to cut bits off, but are fine to have a photo shoot slicing and dicing?
– Kain0_0
Nov 14 at 7:57
they wanted proof, they have proof. :) or just the dna, if the videoz are too unpleasant. but between the two, that proof is indisputable.
– theRiley
Nov 14 at 8:05
Good point, and any squeamish adventurer who adventures can certainly find an already dead troll.
– Kain0_0
Nov 14 at 8:27
add a comment |
up vote
6
down vote
up vote
6
down vote
Bring full body vids including yourself knifing thru the heart & slitting throat of the orc, pre or post-mortem, along with an accompanying dna swab. He checks.
That should do the trick.
answered Nov 13 at 18:40
theRiley
1,41514
Bring full body vids including yourself knifing thru the heart & slitting throat of the orc, pre or post-mortem, along with an accompanying dna swab. He checks.
That should do the trick.
answered Nov 13 at 18:40
theRiley
1,41514
answered Nov 13 at 18:40
theRiley
1,41514
answered Nov 13 at 18:40
theRiley
1,41514
answered Nov 13 at 18:40
theRiley
1,41514
1,41514
Those squeamish adventures don't want to cut bits off, but are fine to have a photo shoot slicing and dicing?
– Kain0_0
Nov 14 at 7:57
they wanted proof, they have proof. :) or just the dna, if the videoz are too unpleasant. but between the two, that proof is indisputable.
– theRiley
Nov 14 at 8:05
Good point, and any squeamish adventurer who adventures can certainly find an already dead troll.
– Kain0_0
Nov 14 at 8:27
add a comment |
Those squeamish adventures don't want to cut bits off, but are fine to have a photo shoot slicing and dicing?
– Kain0_0
Nov 14 at 7:57
they wanted proof, they have proof. :) or just the dna, if the videoz are too unpleasant. but between the two, that proof is indisputable.
– theRiley
Nov 14 at 8:05
Good point, and any squeamish adventurer who adventures can certainly find an already dead troll.
– Kain0_0
Nov 14 at 8:27
Those squeamish adventures don't want to cut bits off, but are fine to have a photo shoot slicing and dicing?
– Kain0_0
Nov 14 at 7:57
Those squeamish adventures don't want to cut bits off, but are fine to have a photo shoot slicing and dicing?
– Kain0_0
Nov 14 at 7:57
they wanted proof, they have proof. :) or just the dna, if the videoz are too unpleasant. but between the two, that proof is indisputable.
– theRiley
Nov 14 at 8:05
they wanted proof, they have proof. :) or just the dna, if the videoz are too unpleasant. but between the two, that proof is indisputable.
– theRiley
Nov 14 at 8:05
Good point, and any squeamish adventurer who adventures can certainly find an already dead troll.
– Kain0_0
Nov 14 at 8:27
Good point, and any squeamish adventurer who adventures can certainly find an already dead troll.
– Kain0_0
Nov 14 at 8:27
add a comment |
up vote
6
down vote
Get a referee / mentor to join your quest.
You may bring 15 troll ears, 20 tusks and 1 gallon of ear wax BUT:
Was it really you who did the work, or did you buy yourself through a gift shop down the street or worse, did you let others do the dirty work?
This is why the Guild of of Adventurers Anonymous provides a referee or a mentor for every one who goes on such an honorable quest of slaying innocent trolls.
The referee writes down every troll you killed and even how you killed them, because there are more than one way to kill a troll and not all of them are favoured by your guild.
answered Nov 14 at 10:49
Alexander von Wernherr
3,6611032
add a comment |
up vote
6
down vote
Get a referee / mentor to join your quest.
You may bring 15 troll ears, 20 tusks and 1 gallon of ear wax BUT:
Was it really you who did the work, or did you buy yourself through a gift shop down the street or worse, did you let others do the dirty work?
This is why the Guild of of Adventurers Anonymous provides a referee or a mentor for every one who goes on such an honorable quest of slaying innocent trolls.
The referee writes down every troll you killed and even how you killed them, because there are more than one way to kill a troll and not all of them are favoured by your guild.
answered Nov 14 at 10:49
Alexander von Wernherr
3,6611032
add a comment |
up vote
6
down vote
up vote
6
down vote
Get a referee / mentor to join your quest.
You may bring 15 troll ears, 20 tusks and 1 gallon of ear wax BUT:
Was it really you who did the work, or did you buy yourself through a gift shop down the street or worse, did you let others do the dirty work?
This is why the Guild of of Adventurers Anonymous provides a referee or a mentor for every one who goes on such an honorable quest of slaying innocent trolls.
The referee writes down every troll you killed and even how you killed them, because there are more than one way to kill a troll and not all of them are favoured by your guild.
answered Nov 14 at 10:49
Alexander von Wernherr
3,6611032
Get a referee / mentor to join your quest.
You may bring 15 troll ears, 20 tusks and 1 gallon of ear wax BUT:
Was it really you who did the work, or did you buy yourself through a gift shop down the street or worse, did you let others do the dirty work?
This is why the Guild of of Adventurers Anonymous provides a referee or a mentor for every one who goes on such an honorable quest of slaying innocent trolls.
The referee writes down every troll you killed and even how you killed them, because there are more than one way to kill a troll and not all of them are favoured by your guild.
answered Nov 14 at 10:49
Alexander von Wernherr
3,6611032
answered Nov 14 at 10:49
Alexander von Wernherr
3,6611032
answered Nov 14 at 10:49
Alexander von Wernherr
3,6611032
answered Nov 14 at 10:49
Alexander von Wernherr
3,6611032
3,6611032
add a comment |
add a comment |
up vote
5
down vote
Get the trolls to chase you
Place the NPC at the top of a safe tower or other natural defence.
Dig a ditch of spikes and cover with branches and leaves. Leave one place where it's easy for you to cross but make sure it looks no different from the rest of the concealed ditch apart from an odd shaped branch.
Find a band of trolls.
Get them to chase you.
Keep shouting insults to enrage them but run just fast enough to keep ahead.
Run until you get to where the NPC is waiting.
Cross the concealed spiked ditch, turn to face the oncoming horde and shout your worst insults whilst making rude hand-gestures.
Watch as the trolls fall into the ditch and impale themselves.
Kill any that manage to cross the narrow concealed bridge by knocking them off it in the manner of Little John and Robin Hood. Shoot stragglers who didn't quite reach the ditch with your bow.
Collect your reward.
This also has the advantage of being re-usable. Make sure no-one lives to tell the tale and you can use the same trick repeatedly.
answered Nov 14 at 9:18
chasly from UK
6,38222963
add a comment |
up vote
5
down vote
Get the trolls to chase you
Place the NPC at the top of a safe tower or other natural defence.
Dig a ditch of spikes and cover with branches and leaves. Leave one place where it's easy for you to cross but make sure it looks no different from the rest of the concealed ditch apart from an odd shaped branch.
Find a band of trolls.
Get them to chase you.
Keep shouting insults to enrage them but run just fast enough to keep ahead.
Run until you get to where the NPC is waiting.
Cross the concealed spiked ditch, turn to face the oncoming horde and shout your worst insults whilst making rude hand-gestures.
Watch as the trolls fall into the ditch and impale themselves.
Kill any that manage to cross the narrow concealed bridge by knocking them off it in the manner of Little John and Robin Hood. Shoot stragglers who didn't quite reach the ditch with your bow.
Collect your reward.
This also has the advantage of being re-usable. Make sure no-one lives to tell the tale and you can use the same trick repeatedly.
answered Nov 14 at 9:18
chasly from UK
6,38222963
add a comment |
up vote
5
down vote
up vote
5
down vote
Get the trolls to chase you
Place the NPC at the top of a safe tower or other natural defence.
Dig a ditch of spikes and cover with branches and leaves. Leave one place where it's easy for you to cross but make sure it looks no different from the rest of the concealed ditch apart from an odd shaped branch.
Find a band of trolls.
Get them to chase you.
Keep shouting insults to enrage them but run just fast enough to keep ahead.
Run until you get to where the NPC is waiting.
Cross the concealed spiked ditch, turn to face the oncoming horde and shout your worst insults whilst making rude hand-gestures.
Watch as the trolls fall into the ditch and impale themselves.
Kill any that manage to cross the narrow concealed bridge by knocking them off it in the manner of Little John and Robin Hood. Shoot stragglers who didn't quite reach the ditch with your bow.
Collect your reward.
This also has the advantage of being re-usable. Make sure no-one lives to tell the tale and you can use the same trick repeatedly.
answered Nov 14 at 9:18
chasly from UK
6,38222963
Get the trolls to chase you
Place the NPC at the top of a safe tower or other natural defence.
Dig a ditch of spikes and cover with branches and leaves. Leave one place where it's easy for you to cross but make sure it looks no different from the rest of the concealed ditch apart from an odd shaped branch.
Find a band of trolls.
Get them to chase you.
Keep shouting insults to enrage them but run just fast enough to keep ahead.
Run until you get to where the NPC is waiting.
Cross the concealed spiked ditch, turn to face the oncoming horde and shout your worst insults whilst making rude hand-gestures.
Watch as the trolls fall into the ditch and impale themselves.
Kill any that manage to cross the narrow concealed bridge by knocking them off it in the manner of Little John and Robin Hood. Shoot stragglers who didn't quite reach the ditch with your bow.
Collect your reward.
This also has the advantage of being re-usable. Make sure no-one lives to tell the tale and you can use the same trick repeatedly.
answered Nov 14 at 9:18
chasly from UK
6,38222963
edited Nov 14 at 9:23
answered Nov 14 at 9:18
chasly from UK
6,38222963
answered Nov 14 at 9:18
chasly from UK
6,38222963
answered Nov 14 at 9:18
chasly from UK
6,38222963
6,38222963
add a comment |
add a comment |
up vote
5
down vote
Do your trolls live in caves?
Wait until the troll goes to sleep after a long day of pillaging villages and farmsteads. *(Usually an adventurer's first instinct is to swoop-in and save the day before another village gets looted, but you have to remember to be patient here)
Roll a giant bolder to the cave entrance. Make sure it's properly secured so the troll can't get out. (Maybe bring some mortar with you just in case...)
Wait a year and then come back to the cave. By this time the troll should have run out of food in the cave and starved to death.
You now have an intact troll body (or more if he had a wife and kids in the cave), with body-parts that you can say came from multiple trolls, you've also got troll weapons and troll clothes as further proof for whatever you want.
answered Nov 14 at 10:40
IKM
512
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up vote
5
down vote
Do your trolls live in caves?
Wait until the troll goes to sleep after a long day of pillaging villages and farmsteads. *(Usually an adventurer's first instinct is to swoop-in and save the day before another village gets looted, but you have to remember to be patient here)
Roll a giant bolder to the cave entrance. Make sure it's properly secured so the troll can't get out. (Maybe bring some mortar with you just in case...)
Wait a year and then come back to the cave. By this time the troll should have run out of food in the cave and starved to death.
You now have an intact troll body (or more if he had a wife and kids in the cave), with body-parts that you can say came from multiple trolls, you've also got troll weapons and troll clothes as further proof for whatever you want.
answered Nov 14 at 10:40
IKM
512
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IKM is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
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add a comment |
up vote
5
down vote
up vote
5
down vote
Do your trolls live in caves?
Wait until the troll goes to sleep after a long day of pillaging villages and farmsteads. *(Usually an adventurer's first instinct is to swoop-in and save the day before another village gets looted, but you have to remember to be patient here)
Roll a giant bolder to the cave entrance. Make sure it's properly secured so the troll can't get out. (Maybe bring some mortar with you just in case...)
Wait a year and then come back to the cave. By this time the troll should have run out of food in the cave and starved to death.
You now have an intact troll body (or more if he had a wife and kids in the cave), with body-parts that you can say came from multiple trolls, you've also got troll weapons and troll clothes as further proof for whatever you want.
answered Nov 14 at 10:40
IKM
512
New contributor
IKM is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
Do your trolls live in caves?
Wait until the troll goes to sleep after a long day of pillaging villages and farmsteads. *(Usually an adventurer's first instinct is to swoop-in and save the day before another village gets looted, but you have to remember to be patient here)
Roll a giant bolder to the cave entrance. Make sure it's properly secured so the troll can't get out. (Maybe bring some mortar with you just in case...)
Wait a year and then come back to the cave. By this time the troll should have run out of food in the cave and starved to death.
You now have an intact troll body (or more if he had a wife and kids in the cave), with body-parts that you can say came from multiple trolls, you've also got troll weapons and troll clothes as further proof for whatever you want.
answered Nov 14 at 10:40
IKM
512
New contributor
IKM is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
answered Nov 14 at 10:40
IKM
512
New contributor
IKM is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
answered Nov 14 at 10:40
IKM
512
answered Nov 14 at 10:40
IKM
512
512
New contributor
IKM is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
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New contributor
IKM is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
IKM is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
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up vote
5
down vote
Depends on your way of killing the trolls without blood, But if there is no modern technology around and going livestream while killing trolls is not possible, then let the troll come to you.
1) Lure the troll near the town
2) Kill the troll
3) Get Rewarded
All of the above answers(skinning the troll, ripping parts of the troll, etc..) could be bypassed by just either waiting for a troll to die, or searching for a dead troll, or making trolls fight each other, take the token and present it. My approach will make sure YOU did it, and the whole town witnessed you kill the trolls.
How you do it without blood is way beyond me, I cant seem to picture killing something without blood.
answered Nov 15 at 7:55
Mr.J
1,538629
add a comment |
up vote
5
down vote
Depends on your way of killing the trolls without blood, But if there is no modern technology around and going livestream while killing trolls is not possible, then let the troll come to you.
1) Lure the troll near the town
2) Kill the troll
3) Get Rewarded
All of the above answers(skinning the troll, ripping parts of the troll, etc..) could be bypassed by just either waiting for a troll to die, or searching for a dead troll, or making trolls fight each other, take the token and present it. My approach will make sure YOU did it, and the whole town witnessed you kill the trolls.
How you do it without blood is way beyond me, I cant seem to picture killing something without blood.
answered Nov 15 at 7:55
Mr.J
1,538629
add a comment |
up vote
5
down vote
up vote
5
down vote
Depends on your way of killing the trolls without blood, But if there is no modern technology around and going livestream while killing trolls is not possible, then let the troll come to you.
1) Lure the troll near the town
2) Kill the troll
3) Get Rewarded
All of the above answers(skinning the troll, ripping parts of the troll, etc..) could be bypassed by just either waiting for a troll to die, or searching for a dead troll, or making trolls fight each other, take the token and present it. My approach will make sure YOU did it, and the whole town witnessed you kill the trolls.
How you do it without blood is way beyond me, I cant seem to picture killing something without blood.
answered Nov 15 at 7:55
Mr.J
1,538629
Depends on your way of killing the trolls without blood, But if there is no modern technology around and going livestream while killing trolls is not possible, then let the troll come to you.
1) Lure the troll near the town
2) Kill the troll
3) Get Rewarded
All of the above answers(skinning the troll, ripping parts of the troll, etc..) could be bypassed by just either waiting for a troll to die, or searching for a dead troll, or making trolls fight each other, take the token and present it. My approach will make sure YOU did it, and the whole town witnessed you kill the trolls.
How you do it without blood is way beyond me, I cant seem to picture killing something without blood.
answered Nov 15 at 7:55
Mr.J
1,538629
answered Nov 15 at 7:55
Mr.J
1,538629
answered Nov 15 at 7:55
Mr.J
1,538629
answered Nov 15 at 7:55
Mr.J
1,538629
1,538629
add a comment |
add a comment |
up vote
4
down vote
- Help my cute elf! You must be female elf. I am sure there will be army of ready help.
- Photo - No magic selfies or too expensive?
- In name of my honor! Trolls are no more! Magic and divine oaths.
- For for reasonable pay, guild verifies kills: sending extra with you or after job is done, while your pay is pending.
- Get troll weapons or whatever your trolls have. Poor trolls.
answered Nov 13 at 20:42
Artemijs Danilovs
3545
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up vote
4
down vote
- Help my cute elf! You must be female elf. I am sure there will be army of ready help.
- Photo - No magic selfies or too expensive?
- In name of my honor! Trolls are no more! Magic and divine oaths.
- For for reasonable pay, guild verifies kills: sending extra with you or after job is done, while your pay is pending.
- Get troll weapons or whatever your trolls have. Poor trolls.
answered Nov 13 at 20:42
Artemijs Danilovs
3545
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up vote
4
down vote
up vote
4
down vote
- Help my cute elf! You must be female elf. I am sure there will be army of ready help.
- Photo - No magic selfies or too expensive?
- In name of my honor! Trolls are no more! Magic and divine oaths.
- For for reasonable pay, guild verifies kills: sending extra with you or after job is done, while your pay is pending.
- Get troll weapons or whatever your trolls have. Poor trolls.
answered Nov 13 at 20:42
Artemijs Danilovs
3545
New contributor
Artemijs Danilovs is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
- Help my cute elf! You must be female elf. I am sure there will be army of ready help.
- Photo - No magic selfies or too expensive?
- In name of my honor! Trolls are no more! Magic and divine oaths.
- For for reasonable pay, guild verifies kills: sending extra with you or after job is done, while your pay is pending.
- Get troll weapons or whatever your trolls have. Poor trolls.
answered Nov 13 at 20:42
Artemijs Danilovs
3545
New contributor
Artemijs Danilovs is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
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answered Nov 13 at 20:42
Artemijs Danilovs
3545
New contributor
Artemijs Danilovs is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
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answered Nov 13 at 20:42
Artemijs Danilovs
3545
answered Nov 13 at 20:42
Artemijs Danilovs
3545
3545
New contributor
Artemijs Danilovs is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
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New contributor
Artemijs Danilovs is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
Artemijs Danilovs is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
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up vote
4
down vote
Take their Mojo
Adult trolls (or at least, the Warcraft variety) have their own special form of magic (Voodoo in Warcraft terms) that requires a special bag of charms (A liquid in Warcraft), called a Mojo. A troll will never willingly part with their Mojo while they are alive, and all trolls carry Mojo, so there is a one to one relationship between a Mojo and a troll. It doesn't require any severing of limbs, nor cutting of body parts to harvest, and it's relatively easy to carry. It's also hard to make a forgery, because it's infused with the troll's personal Voodoo magic.
answered Nov 15 at 13:40
Nzall
4,97112261
This also allows all kinds of options for fun quests helping trolls regain their lost mojo.
– Dewi Morgan
Nov 15 at 16:43
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up vote
4
down vote
Take their Mojo
Adult trolls (or at least, the Warcraft variety) have their own special form of magic (Voodoo in Warcraft terms) that requires a special bag of charms (A liquid in Warcraft), called a Mojo. A troll will never willingly part with their Mojo while they are alive, and all trolls carry Mojo, so there is a one to one relationship between a Mojo and a troll. It doesn't require any severing of limbs, nor cutting of body parts to harvest, and it's relatively easy to carry. It's also hard to make a forgery, because it's infused with the troll's personal Voodoo magic.
answered Nov 15 at 13:40
Nzall
4,97112261
This also allows all kinds of options for fun quests helping trolls regain their lost mojo.
– Dewi Morgan
Nov 15 at 16:43
add a comment |
up vote
4
down vote
up vote
4
down vote
Take their Mojo
Adult trolls (or at least, the Warcraft variety) have their own special form of magic (Voodoo in Warcraft terms) that requires a special bag of charms (A liquid in Warcraft), called a Mojo. A troll will never willingly part with their Mojo while they are alive, and all trolls carry Mojo, so there is a one to one relationship between a Mojo and a troll. It doesn't require any severing of limbs, nor cutting of body parts to harvest, and it's relatively easy to carry. It's also hard to make a forgery, because it's infused with the troll's personal Voodoo magic.
answered Nov 15 at 13:40
Nzall
4,97112261
Take their Mojo
Adult trolls (or at least, the Warcraft variety) have their own special form of magic (Voodoo in Warcraft terms) that requires a special bag of charms (A liquid in Warcraft), called a Mojo. A troll will never willingly part with their Mojo while they are alive, and all trolls carry Mojo, so there is a one to one relationship between a Mojo and a troll. It doesn't require any severing of limbs, nor cutting of body parts to harvest, and it's relatively easy to carry. It's also hard to make a forgery, because it's infused with the troll's personal Voodoo magic.
answered Nov 15 at 13:40
Nzall
4,97112261
answered Nov 15 at 13:40
Nzall
4,97112261
answered Nov 15 at 13:40
Nzall
4,97112261
answered Nov 15 at 13:40
Nzall
4,97112261
4,97112261
This also allows all kinds of options for fun quests helping trolls regain their lost mojo.
– Dewi Morgan
Nov 15 at 16:43
add a comment |
This also allows all kinds of options for fun quests helping trolls regain their lost mojo.
– Dewi Morgan
Nov 15 at 16:43
This also allows all kinds of options for fun quests helping trolls regain their lost mojo.
– Dewi Morgan
Nov 15 at 16:43
This also allows all kinds of options for fun quests helping trolls regain their lost mojo.
– Dewi Morgan
Nov 15 at 16:43
add a comment |
up vote
4
down vote
Insurance. No really.
Where there is money exchanging hands, there is risk. Where there is risk and money exchanging hands, there is always someone looking to make money from this.
Have your reward payers set the value of killed troll through investment from those who wish to see the trolls gone. Have this value be underwritten by insurers. Only troll kills which can be verified by an agent of the underwriters will count. This causes the troll hunters to pay to bring along a verified agent of the insurance agency. This Agent also collects a salary based on how few trolls are killed.
If he lies by reducing the number, he can rest assured the next troll hunt will either see him not being brought along or being used as "accidental" bait. If he lies by increasing the number, he will be paid less in his salary. Finding this value to reduce the chance of bribery is a big part of insurance.
If he tells the truth, the troll hunters are happy that he isn't taking money away from them. The insurance company is happy because their books balance. And the investors are happy because there are less trolls running around.
Edit: Also forgot that the same insurers will be offering life insurance policies and workmen's compensation options to the troll hunters. Heck, they can even offer insurance for poor hunting years.
answered Nov 15 at 11:26
ColonelPanic
2,882314
add a comment |
up vote
4
down vote
Insurance. No really.
Where there is money exchanging hands, there is risk. Where there is risk and money exchanging hands, there is always someone looking to make money from this.
Have your reward payers set the value of killed troll through investment from those who wish to see the trolls gone. Have this value be underwritten by insurers. Only troll kills which can be verified by an agent of the underwriters will count. This causes the troll hunters to pay to bring along a verified agent of the insurance agency. This Agent also collects a salary based on how few trolls are killed.
If he lies by reducing the number, he can rest assured the next troll hunt will either see him not being brought along or being used as "accidental" bait. If he lies by increasing the number, he will be paid less in his salary. Finding this value to reduce the chance of bribery is a big part of insurance.
If he tells the truth, the troll hunters are happy that he isn't taking money away from them. The insurance company is happy because their books balance. And the investors are happy because there are less trolls running around.
Edit: Also forgot that the same insurers will be offering life insurance policies and workmen's compensation options to the troll hunters. Heck, they can even offer insurance for poor hunting years.
answered Nov 15 at 11:26
ColonelPanic
2,882314
add a comment |
up vote
4
down vote
up vote
4
down vote
Insurance. No really.
Where there is money exchanging hands, there is risk. Where there is risk and money exchanging hands, there is always someone looking to make money from this.
Have your reward payers set the value of killed troll through investment from those who wish to see the trolls gone. Have this value be underwritten by insurers. Only troll kills which can be verified by an agent of the underwriters will count. This causes the troll hunters to pay to bring along a verified agent of the insurance agency. This Agent also collects a salary based on how few trolls are killed.
If he lies by reducing the number, he can rest assured the next troll hunt will either see him not being brought along or being used as "accidental" bait. If he lies by increasing the number, he will be paid less in his salary. Finding this value to reduce the chance of bribery is a big part of insurance.
If he tells the truth, the troll hunters are happy that he isn't taking money away from them. The insurance company is happy because their books balance. And the investors are happy because there are less trolls running around.
Edit: Also forgot that the same insurers will be offering life insurance policies and workmen's compensation options to the troll hunters. Heck, they can even offer insurance for poor hunting years.
answered Nov 15 at 11:26
ColonelPanic
2,882314
Insurance. No really.
Where there is money exchanging hands, there is risk. Where there is risk and money exchanging hands, there is always someone looking to make money from this.
Have your reward payers set the value of killed troll through investment from those who wish to see the trolls gone. Have this value be underwritten by insurers. Only troll kills which can be verified by an agent of the underwriters will count. This causes the troll hunters to pay to bring along a verified agent of the insurance agency. This Agent also collects a salary based on how few trolls are killed.
If he lies by reducing the number, he can rest assured the next troll hunt will either see him not being brought along or being used as "accidental" bait. If he lies by increasing the number, he will be paid less in his salary. Finding this value to reduce the chance of bribery is a big part of insurance.
If he tells the truth, the troll hunters are happy that he isn't taking money away from them. The insurance company is happy because their books balance. And the investors are happy because there are less trolls running around.
Edit: Also forgot that the same insurers will be offering life insurance policies and workmen's compensation options to the troll hunters. Heck, they can even offer insurance for poor hunting years.
answered Nov 15 at 11:26
ColonelPanic
2,882314
edited Nov 15 at 15:12
answered Nov 15 at 11:26
ColonelPanic
2,882314
answered Nov 15 at 11:26
ColonelPanic
2,882314
answered Nov 15 at 11:26
ColonelPanic
2,882314
2,882314
add a comment |
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up vote
3
down vote
Troll Semen
With genocidal adventurers constantly picking off trolls to improve their status in society it would be necessary for societies to engage in conservational efforts to stabilize the troll populations.
Seeing as how there are adventurers who do not wish to return traditional socially rewarding trophies they can be used to instead return materials useful in conservation efforts.
Using a syringe an adventurer could harvest the eggs or semen from dead trolls. Because they are dead their blood flow has stopped so sticking them with a needle will not result in any significant spray that could get on them.
The eggs and semen could then be used to artificially impregnate captive trolls thereby replacing their population.
answered Nov 14 at 16:19
anon
10.2k1357
add a comment |
up vote
3
down vote
Troll Semen
With genocidal adventurers constantly picking off trolls to improve their status in society it would be necessary for societies to engage in conservational efforts to stabilize the troll populations.
Seeing as how there are adventurers who do not wish to return traditional socially rewarding trophies they can be used to instead return materials useful in conservation efforts.
Using a syringe an adventurer could harvest the eggs or semen from dead trolls. Because they are dead their blood flow has stopped so sticking them with a needle will not result in any significant spray that could get on them.
The eggs and semen could then be used to artificially impregnate captive trolls thereby replacing their population.
answered Nov 14 at 16:19
anon
10.2k1357
add a comment |
up vote
3
down vote
up vote
3
down vote
Troll Semen
With genocidal adventurers constantly picking off trolls to improve their status in society it would be necessary for societies to engage in conservational efforts to stabilize the troll populations.
Seeing as how there are adventurers who do not wish to return traditional socially rewarding trophies they can be used to instead return materials useful in conservation efforts.
Using a syringe an adventurer could harvest the eggs or semen from dead trolls. Because they are dead their blood flow has stopped so sticking them with a needle will not result in any significant spray that could get on them.
The eggs and semen could then be used to artificially impregnate captive trolls thereby replacing their population.
answered Nov 14 at 16:19
anon
10.2k1357
Troll Semen
With genocidal adventurers constantly picking off trolls to improve their status in society it would be necessary for societies to engage in conservational efforts to stabilize the troll populations.
Seeing as how there are adventurers who do not wish to return traditional socially rewarding trophies they can be used to instead return materials useful in conservation efforts.
Using a syringe an adventurer could harvest the eggs or semen from dead trolls. Because they are dead their blood flow has stopped so sticking them with a needle will not result in any significant spray that could get on them.
The eggs and semen could then be used to artificially impregnate captive trolls thereby replacing their population.
answered Nov 14 at 16:19
anon
10.2k1357
answered Nov 14 at 16:19
anon
10.2k1357
answered Nov 14 at 16:19
anon
10.2k1357
answered Nov 14 at 16:19
anon
10.2k1357
10.2k1357
add a comment |
add a comment |
up vote
3
down vote
Livestream it.
Since you didn’t mention anything about your world I’m going to assume a similar world to ours. If it is a less technologically advanced world then figure out a magic livestream that people can watch in some specifically built theater.
You’re an adventurer with the equivalence of a live gaming Youtube stream. Thousands of peasants watch you (and others) ridding the world of those pesky trolls. Sometimes the adventurers die horribly in the process, which makes it even more entertaining.
answered Nov 15 at 2:50
Sebastiaan van den Broek
1413
add a comment |
up vote
3
down vote
Livestream it.
Since you didn’t mention anything about your world I’m going to assume a similar world to ours. If it is a less technologically advanced world then figure out a magic livestream that people can watch in some specifically built theater.
You’re an adventurer with the equivalence of a live gaming Youtube stream. Thousands of peasants watch you (and others) ridding the world of those pesky trolls. Sometimes the adventurers die horribly in the process, which makes it even more entertaining.
answered Nov 15 at 2:50
Sebastiaan van den Broek
1413
add a comment |
up vote
3
down vote
up vote
3
down vote
Livestream it.
Since you didn’t mention anything about your world I’m going to assume a similar world to ours. If it is a less technologically advanced world then figure out a magic livestream that people can watch in some specifically built theater.
You’re an adventurer with the equivalence of a live gaming Youtube stream. Thousands of peasants watch you (and others) ridding the world of those pesky trolls. Sometimes the adventurers die horribly in the process, which makes it even more entertaining.
answered Nov 15 at 2:50
Sebastiaan van den Broek
1413
Livestream it.
Since you didn’t mention anything about your world I’m going to assume a similar world to ours. If it is a less technologically advanced world then figure out a magic livestream that people can watch in some specifically built theater.
You’re an adventurer with the equivalence of a live gaming Youtube stream. Thousands of peasants watch you (and others) ridding the world of those pesky trolls. Sometimes the adventurers die horribly in the process, which makes it even more entertaining.
answered Nov 15 at 2:50
Sebastiaan van den Broek
1413
answered Nov 15 at 2:50
Sebastiaan van den Broek
1413
answered Nov 15 at 2:50
Sebastiaan van den Broek
1413
answered Nov 15 at 2:50
Sebastiaan van den Broek
1413
1413
add a comment |
add a comment |
up vote
2
down vote
Let's assume that an ear is enough proof you've killed a troll. Your adventures could just hire an NPC who waits till the fight is over, then cuts off the ears of the dead trolls and put them into a chest, half filled with sand (the sand will keep any blood from dripping out of the box). Then all the adventurers need to do is present the chest to whoever asked for 15 trolls.
Of course, if the adventurers have a DEX above 6, it shouldn't be too hard for them to cut of ears without getting blood on them.
I'm far more interested how they plan to kill 15 trolls without getting blood on them.
answered Nov 14 at 23:16
Abigail
1,399314
add a comment |
up vote
2
down vote
Let's assume that an ear is enough proof you've killed a troll. Your adventures could just hire an NPC who waits till the fight is over, then cuts off the ears of the dead trolls and put them into a chest, half filled with sand (the sand will keep any blood from dripping out of the box). Then all the adventurers need to do is present the chest to whoever asked for 15 trolls.
Of course, if the adventurers have a DEX above 6, it shouldn't be too hard for them to cut of ears without getting blood on them.
I'm far more interested how they plan to kill 15 trolls without getting blood on them.
answered Nov 14 at 23:16
Abigail
1,399314
add a comment |
up vote
2
down vote
up vote
2
down vote
Let's assume that an ear is enough proof you've killed a troll. Your adventures could just hire an NPC who waits till the fight is over, then cuts off the ears of the dead trolls and put them into a chest, half filled with sand (the sand will keep any blood from dripping out of the box). Then all the adventurers need to do is present the chest to whoever asked for 15 trolls.
Of course, if the adventurers have a DEX above 6, it shouldn't be too hard for them to cut of ears without getting blood on them.
I'm far more interested how they plan to kill 15 trolls without getting blood on them.
answered Nov 14 at 23:16
Abigail
1,399314
Let's assume that an ear is enough proof you've killed a troll. Your adventures could just hire an NPC who waits till the fight is over, then cuts off the ears of the dead trolls and put them into a chest, half filled with sand (the sand will keep any blood from dripping out of the box). Then all the adventurers need to do is present the chest to whoever asked for 15 trolls.
Of course, if the adventurers have a DEX above 6, it shouldn't be too hard for them to cut of ears without getting blood on them.
I'm far more interested how they plan to kill 15 trolls without getting blood on them.
answered Nov 14 at 23:16
Abigail
1,399314
answered Nov 14 at 23:16
Abigail
1,399314
answered Nov 14 at 23:16
Abigail
1,399314
answered Nov 14 at 23:16
Abigail
1,399314
1,399314
add a comment |
add a comment |
up vote
2
down vote
Bury the dead trolls by anthills, termite mounds, or other scavenger insects. Come back in a year or so when the trollskull is clean and hand that in.
Alternatively, boil the trolls, the trollflesh will fall right off, again you get clean skulls and bones, as well as rendered trollfat and other usable parts.
Maybe a bit stinky though, if you're not gonna clean the bodies before boiling. You'll be basically boiling the bodies in a vat of trollcrap.
answered Nov 14 at 21:57
Dewi Morgan
4,434928
add a comment |
up vote
2
down vote
Bury the dead trolls by anthills, termite mounds, or other scavenger insects. Come back in a year or so when the trollskull is clean and hand that in.
Alternatively, boil the trolls, the trollflesh will fall right off, again you get clean skulls and bones, as well as rendered trollfat and other usable parts.
Maybe a bit stinky though, if you're not gonna clean the bodies before boiling. You'll be basically boiling the bodies in a vat of trollcrap.
answered Nov 14 at 21:57
Dewi Morgan
4,434928
add a comment |
up vote
2
down vote
up vote
2
down vote
Bury the dead trolls by anthills, termite mounds, or other scavenger insects. Come back in a year or so when the trollskull is clean and hand that in.
Alternatively, boil the trolls, the trollflesh will fall right off, again you get clean skulls and bones, as well as rendered trollfat and other usable parts.
Maybe a bit stinky though, if you're not gonna clean the bodies before boiling. You'll be basically boiling the bodies in a vat of trollcrap.
answered Nov 14 at 21:57
Dewi Morgan
4,434928
Bury the dead trolls by anthills, termite mounds, or other scavenger insects. Come back in a year or so when the trollskull is clean and hand that in.
Alternatively, boil the trolls, the trollflesh will fall right off, again you get clean skulls and bones, as well as rendered trollfat and other usable parts.
Maybe a bit stinky though, if you're not gonna clean the bodies before boiling. You'll be basically boiling the bodies in a vat of trollcrap.
answered Nov 14 at 21:57
Dewi Morgan
4,434928
edited Nov 15 at 15:14
answered Nov 14 at 21:57
Dewi Morgan
4,434928
answered Nov 14 at 21:57
Dewi Morgan
4,434928
answered Nov 14 at 21:57
Dewi Morgan
4,434928
4,434928
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21
Take a selfie with each dead troll :)
– Surb
Nov 14 at 12:41
18
Squeamish adventurers that kill. Sounds like this is a self-solving problem because such adventurers probably wouldn't get hired or are too squeamish for the task at hand. I think that after a troll swings their weapon at the adventurer's neckline for the nth consecutive time then the adventurer should get over their squeamishness or is already ded.
– MonkeyZeus
Nov 14 at 13:45
6
Beowulf brought home Grendel's arm for proof. Which, uh, worked soooooo well.
– Damon
Nov 14 at 14:36
3
Why are we killing things? Why 15 things? Usually when people in this world get annoyed at each other, they don't have a specific victim count they're going for. In fact, the way that I think the professionals usually do it is, "kill all x in place y", or even, "take x from those guys". So, this question's objective would be made a bit moot by having a more substantial objective.
– sethrin
Nov 15 at 3:29
2
Most people seem to have missed the obvious. If the trolls are already dead they won't bleed anymore...
– Drunken Code Monkey
Nov 15 at 13:59